"samael" poems
There’s a picture perfect
moon in the sky and
all I can think about is
you
(which doesn’t make sense
because the moon in the heavens and
all the stars in the galaxy have
nothing to do with you and I).
I think it’s because it was you who I
told all my secrets to,
you who I confided in—I think it’s because
I trusted you.
Sometimes I look up at the cosmos and
wonder what type of angel she is
and then I wonder if I ever told you
my deep, dark thoughts about
what happened.
I can’t remember.
My mind is as thick and heavy
as my tongue feels—
fog
everywhere and I cannot see
where I am going, much less
where I have come from.
There’s something inside of me that,
like a caged dog, is awaiting to be
unlocked from its restraining bars and
I don’t know where to start talking without
sounding like an absolute madman.
I think that this poem has transformed from
a few lines about you to
a few lines about her and to be honest,
I don’t remember the last time
I wrote about her
(but I guess I should try).
I was a child when I first went to bed
and a teenager as I turned in my sleep—
we could be twins, she and I,
with our closed eyes, and
visions of stars at night and
pale complexions like
the sand on the beach basking
in the glow of the hanging moon.
I wonder if she met Samael.
I wonder if he was nice.
They told me how much I looked like her;
they gushed about how we had the
same personality, same sense of humor,
but I didn’t want to hear a word they said—
I don’t think I could stand to look
myself in the mirror if that were true
because it would be a constant reminder of
her
and I don’t want to be reminded.
I think that we all start off as angels and
that somehow we end up here,
bound down to a life full of interactions
and paths to cross and plans to make;
I think that we all finish as angels and
that somehow we end up there,
no longer a single form and single being,
we become infinite once more.
But then I remember that even Lucifer,
himself, once wore white wings and I think
that sometimes we’re no better than him—
that I’m no better than him.
I hope Raphael can fix us and
I pray that Uriel can set us straight
because in this aphotic world, I want
to be able to see straight down into
into the abyss.
I want to see you through unbiased eyes and
hear you through impartial ears the way
that I used to be able to until that night
outside your house.
I want to tell you all of these things I think
about the two of us—
all these things I think about my
mother
and that night and those days
in which it happened.
Just please don’t clip my wings.
Sep 17, 2013
Sep 17, 2013 at 11:57 PM UTC
OR: “A brief treatise on Antediluvian Gayology ”
Α Ω
Said Demiurge to Samael:
“This universe is getting old.
Let’s break on through and fly beyond
to where the lead shines gold.”
Said Samael to Demiurge:
“I’m with you, dude. Let’s rock and roll
Let’s rip this veil of Maya in two
And glimpse the Oversoul…”
Replied his echo Demiurge:
“Devoid, divine, it’s ALL good, bro;
The sweetest wine is found within
Let liquid truth now flow…”
So Samael let drop the towel
And spread his doctrine’s orifice.
The mystic eye of gnosis shined
in luminous artifice.
Then Sam and Dem, conjoined like beasts
made cosmic love (in Koine Greek),
transforming gold to toxic lead –
and Truth into a freak.
Sep 17, 2015
Sep 17, 2015 at 9:51 PM UTC
i didn’t understand you–
i don’t think anyone did.
i don’t think anyone could.
you were the wrath of the lamb
and the rib of Adam,
you were the burning cherubim by
the savage Garden,
you were Samael and Apollyon,
brooding in Gehenna
you were a god and a devil,
and i’m afraid
that i never found out who
won, in the end.
when you loved me,
was it because you knew who
i was or was it because
you knew what i would become?
May 1, 2016
May 1, 2016 at 7:19 PM UTC
I feel like the first fallen angel.
I know how Samael felt.
As Lucifer he cursed the stars, at his rainbow’s end
There’s no *** of gold.
To live out his time;
With nothing to gain…
Oh my Lord; I could feel that pain.
And though it damns me to God, I would heal that pain.
When there’s no place left to hide.
Nowhere left in my God’s eyes, we surrender to;
The deadliest Sin.
The Sin Of pride.
Would it hurt so much to hold me?
Would it cause you so much loss?
I know what’s gone wrong
And I know who came last
But I was so busy with changing the past
Then I,
I looked to heaven for guidance,
And all that I found there was you.
This sin was a cold satisfaction
We fell where atrocity flew
When there’s no place left to hide
No place left in my God’s eyes;
We surrender to the deadliest Sin.
The Sin of Pride.
Jan 20, 2014
Jan 20, 2014 at 11:51 AM UTC
My dear, I am sorry for what I have done.
The past continues to haunt my present day actions and feelings, and I feel that has shown time and time again.
I sincerely apoligise for me being so clingy. Clingy enough to make you stay away from me.
I sincerely apoligise for me being so oblivious and idiotic whenever we talk. I often don't realise that you want to drop a certain topic, or that you are generally uncomfortable with whatever situation I put you in.
Please understand that I've never meant to cause you mental anguish, but instead, love and endless support.
I know that, in the end, you doubt most of what I say.
And I wish that I could so something to make that distrust go away.
Maybe someday you'll see the light in between the scenes.
Or perhaps someday the darkness of the scenes will overwhelm us both, and we will no longer have the need to worry.
Please come back soon... I miss you, and I need you here in my arms.
All the love,
Samael
Jan 31, 2020
Jan 31, 2020 at 10:29 PM UTC
Zen sued from the start
an optimistic mystic puzzle
mist frustrated, visualized
in did I go, enter the smoke
once flown the clocks stop
a clash of whose-whose happens
an individual choice resounds
color dutifully, create playfully
or else Samael takes the blame
a detail baffles are met
Nov 13, 2014
Nov 13, 2014 at 9:02 AM UTC
tired of playing games
you better disappear
I've got spiders
crawling up neck
venom inside my veins
can't believe I'm friends
with the Antichrist
roaming the realm of the dead
my lungs are vanishing
It's bad
She's bad
we're bad
I know
he knows
I've reached the bottomless pit
lost in paradise
beside my angel of death
Oct 30, 2018
Oct 30, 2018 at 3:25 PM UTC
I wake suddenly with a start
knowing something is there.
Out of the darkness there is
the sound of mighty wings.
I can feel the air stirring
around me at their beating.
Suddenly, in the room, there
is the smell of rotting meat.
I am afraid..
A feeling of utter finality fills
the room where I lay and I
fall from bed and to my knees
bowing my head in acceptance.
With certainty I know that
he has finally come for me.
Samael..........Death's Angel
Apr 21, 2015
Apr 21, 2015 at 8:14 AM UTC