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kirk Dec 2018
The Christmas rush has started, and the countdown has begun
Advent doors are opened, but look what you have done
You've ridiculed the Bounty bar, and your spoiling all the fun
Why buy a Celebration, if your not happy after one ?

What's behind the cardboard doors, what did you all expect
A gold ring perhaps, or the keys for a corvette?
Why bother with an advent, when you have no respect
There's no need for chocolate genocide, or coconut neglect

You shouldn't be so outraged, with your Christmas Celebrations
I don't understand the malice, or the advent hesitations
If you don't want a bounty, buy heroes or sensations
It's hardly a matter for Interpol, or the united nations

Celebrations are your choice, there's no cause for your regret
The outcome is quite obvious, why are you so upset
Are the pictures not a clue, to what your gonna get ?
No rarity of Bounty hunters, so don't mess with Boba Fett

Are Maltesers that much lighter, in a Galaxy far away
Maybe you will find Mars, in between the Milky Way
A Twix or Galaxy Caramel, they we're for a different day
But you've dissed your celebrations, and no longer want to play

Some YouTube clips have surfaced, and I have read the blogs
I think it's just pathetic, seeing chocolate thrown down bogs
Your creating your own misery, as well as yule time logs
You won't be very happy, when your toilet blocks and clogs

On day two you still complained, and you wanted to resist
Is that because the chocolate, was not on your Christmas list
Would you be pleased with mistletoe, if you never did get kissed
Christmas spirit has been lost, with your Snickers in a twist

Some people are just morons, that's the message that they've sent
Their expectations are to high, and cruel jokes are never meant
Why is Bounty not as good, to start of an event
A Snickers in your calendar, doesn't mean a ruined advent
Following the recent reports concerning the Celebrations Advent Calendar.
It was reported to be more than a disappointment to chocolate lovers.
Behind door number one low and behold was a Bounty much to customers dismay.
To add insult to injury what did celebrations manufactures do then, they only went and put a Snickers behind the second door.
Can you believe the sheer audacity of some companies especially ones manufacturing Christmas products.
According to some people who decided to purchase these calenders their whole Christmas had been ruined because the worse two chocolates had been used first.
These being bounty and snickers what a choice to begin the Christmas countdown wouldn't you say !
I kind of understand the logic here if you think about it then would it not make sense to incorporate what is considered to be the worse choice within the Celebrations range to be included first.
Then as the countdown commences the excitement then gets better as Christmas eve approaches.
This way there isn't going to be a bigger disappointment as Christmas gets closer.
But I guess it is subjective as to what the worse chocolate choice is, personally I like bounty and snickers, in fact I would rather have those than say Twix or the out of proportion Maltesers which is unnatural to say the least.
******* imagine if these calendars started of with that oh the uproar we would have had then.
I don't know about you but if you can't spread the joy and the Christmas spirit by a simple advent calendar then maybe they should stop making them, just give up on the failure (according to certain customers) of inserting the incorrect pieces of chocolate.
Due to this end I decided to write this small piece on the peoples disappointment in their celebrations advent calendar
Bayn Sep 2013
Many creationists view the duckbilled platypus as an enigma that evolution cannot explain.
Super-Platypus attempts to escape from aliens.
Am I one of yours? Little Platypus?
In August of that year the Submarine Support Depot
platypus debate began.
Out of a large cloth travel bag,
Diana pulled the furry platypus hand puppet
platypus-in-a-can.
Boba Fett told Darth Vader, "As you wish," he was really saying, "I love you."
I took a quiz once that told me I was a platypus in a past life.
August Jan 2013
Keep in mind that I'm attempting to keep this simple
Today I realized that I'm quite bitter
I also realized that I'm a terrible quitter
But I also decided that when I'm feeling down
I'll make a compilation to get me off the ground
Of things I love, because I know there are many
I apologize if you don't feel like reading plenty
I shouldn't postpone this any longer
I need to make myself realize that I'm stronger

So, things I love.
I love hot long showers
I love photographing flowers
I love a hot steaming cup of tea
I love walking only 6 blocks to go to the library
I love the feeling of a cold pillow on my face
I love plugging in head phones & disappearing without a trace
I love it when a person plays with my hair
I love Chicago, did you know I'm moving there?
I love paper cranes
I love filling up picture frames
I love the smell of old books
I love walking around town, alone, finding hidden nooks
I love deja vu, which I'm actually having this instant
I love writing poetry, hearing your guys' opinions, even if they are ever so distant
I love the long drag of a skinny cigarette
I love standing by the back door after a sunset
I love marbles, elephants, old dusty cameras, & boba fett
I love finding lovely people that I've never met
I love going to sleep at a decent time, which feels like never at all
I love putting up quotes that make my heart flutter on my wall
I love reading books that make me feel changed after I'm done
I love cooking for everyone
I love doing things by myself, no matter how hard
I love the fact that I'll never own a credit card
I love that it makes me happy when I get compliments
I love, also, that if I'm insulted, I couldn't give a ****
I love the emphasis on curse words that comes with them
I love tasting words in your mouth again and again
I love websites that feel like the are created for me
I love whenever I can remember my dreams
I love meeting a handsome strangers glance
I love that even though I meet it, that I will never have a chance
I love taking breaks
I love when people don't know I know they are fakes
I love experiences
I love watching as someone dances

I love all of these things, and so many more
I'm sorry if you didn't want to read all the things I adore
This piece isn't meant to be elaborately written or read
It's only purpose is to flow & to solve some problems in my head
Maybe I sort of want to make the reader feel better too
Realize that the things that you love are full of value
Maybe I suggest you write some of the things you love
Before you push away everything good with a violent shove
I really hope that I helped you as much as a I helped me
Read these & appreciate the simple things, I hope you'll see

I think I'll do more of these in the future.
This was very beneficial. I feel so much better now. Writing is such a wonderful therapeutic tool & sometimes it is just so hard to focus on anything but the negative.
August Jan 2013
If you're a bird than I'm a stone
You are time & I had to toll
If you are lonely, I am alone
You rock but I don't roll

You are coffee, but I'm not creamer
You're a realist, **** that, I'm a dreamer
You are Han Solo, & I'm Boba Fett
Sometimes I think it'd be better if we never met

I hate you I hate you I hate you
© Amara Pendergraft 2013
katewinslet Sep 2015
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Keine Eindeutige Regel may well to your Genaue Anteil der ende Flüssigkeit sowie Mehl, other bei der Brotherstellung verwendet Werden, gegeben Werden,
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2016
by now you should have figured:
it's easier to satirise an everyday British
civilian with a radio,
than it is satirising a British politician
with a sense of rhetoric and
no Poker skills; instead viably
all cleavage with piquant punctuation,
zesty with a protruding ah...
an opera in glutton minor -
(never the colon preceding italicised
re-)
            meine land, meine land,
           die land alle meine land
           die land von Strauß -
           die land von fett walküre -
           gott ist tot: diät ist boren
.
it is easier to it's easier to satirise an everyday
British  civilian with a radio,
than it is satirising a British politician
with anything than politics - as assured
with deciphering the enigma
or the British relations musicology speaking
relating to the continent with that
one favoured spy / messiah: Hændel - i.e.
the one admirer of Liszt that turned to terror tactics
and broke the pianist fingers in hope of the pianist
never wedging a Cuban cigar  between middle and index;
love is such an oddity, it can make jealous men
love by hating into a choking joke.
Jules Jun 2017
We were on top of your rooftop, still five inches between us, looking up the sky and fighting the urge to hold hands. I thought of all the things I kept within me.

I didn't even like you, at least that's what I thought.
I didn't like the way my name slips through your tongue or how calming your voice sounds over the phone.
I didn't like our late night conversations about how vast this universe is and how the both of us are mere particles in this world filled with billions, silently in anguish.
I didn't even like our afternoons spent biking around the park, enjoying the breeze and color of fall, our favorite season of all.

I didn't like the way you smile at me whenever I'm being serious, when I'm in this corner contemplating myself, you'll flash that sarcastic smile of yours that makes me want to punch you.

I didn't like the way your palm touches the back of my neck whenever we would kiss,

I didn't like the way you say "I love you", soothing and calming,

I hated myself for never saying it back.
"I love you" you would say
"I know" I'd reply



The truth is that I don't just like you or love you, it's a very shallow way of labeling what I truly feel for you.

My darling, I live for you.

I live for these moments, I live for your smile, your sweetness, and warmness. Even words aren't enough to describe the euphoria that you give me.
You've kept me alive, you're the reason of my every breath,
You're my rock.

And I live for you even when you drive me insane, especially then.
I wouldn't have it any other way.

And as my favorite book says
"“You can be Han Solo, ‘And I’ll be Boba Fett. I’ll cross the sky for you.”


Now we're back on your rooftop, hand in hand, no inches in between.
this piece is inspired by rainbow rowell's eleanor and park, my all time favorite ya novel :)
Cameron Boyd May 2016
A cannibal of currency
You’re not yourself anymore.
Became your purse long ago,
Sense of self tied to coins
Of which you’ve never held.

Little man, little man,
where is your home?
The house on this hill
Just an empty shell
Painted like so much canvas.

There for the eyes of your peers
But your peers aren’t your friends
And your friends aren’t around
Tell me please, where did they go?

Little man, little man,
Do you hear the sound?
No one is calling your name
Where did they go
And where are they now
And why aren’t your friends in their homes?
Little man, little man
Do you hear the sound?
They’re making it plain as day.

You ate their income
Ate them of their house and their home.
A cannibal for currency-
Consumed all your friends,
Fat little pig on the hill.

Little man, little man
(You) can no longer ignore the sounds
Of ten thousand mouths
All hungry for you.

You ate their money
But you couldn’t stomach
The pure human spirit inside.
Now they have crawled back,
Out from the ghettos,
Starving and hungry for you.

Forced to eat each other,
You’ve all but raised cannibals,
But this time of flesh and of blood.
Little pig, little pig,
Can you hear the sound,
Or have you become deaf
To your own cries as well?

No one will miss you
You don’t have a home
Your friends became food
A long time ago.

(Die Geld von die Leute Sie Essen gekauft
Sie isst ihr Geld,
Mehr jeden Tag,
Kein Geld fur Essen
Sie isst Sich,
Jagd nach dem Hunger,
Fett kleiner Mann,
Jetzt der Jaeger ist Essen fur jeden Mund
Kleinen Schwein, Kleinen Schwein
Konnen Sie den ton horen?)*

Greasy lip smacks
Sound like ten thousand claps,
The only applause that you’ll ever hear.
----
*The absolutely horribly written German stanza (pls halp).

The money of the people bought their food
You ate their money, More every day,
No money for food, They ate themselves,
Hunting the hungry, Fat little man,
Now the hunter is food for every mouth,
Little pig, little pig, Can you hear the sound?

It’s been forever since I spoke any sort of German and it’s fading fast. Sad face.
Boby Fett’s adventures

I used to be a friend of Joseph when he was a bank robber
when he robbed a bank in Tbilisi, I helped him to get away
the money he said was to help his cause.
One can say he owed me a favour, which came in handy.
There was a revolution and Joseph became a president
that was ok, but he became brutal and one evening
when we sat drinking Georgian wine, we had a discussion
I called him a butcher.
I thought I was going to be shot, but since he owed me a favour
I was sent to Siberia with a bag of potatoes.
Luckily, I had a box of matches in my pocket a knife hidden
in my shoe, therefore able to survive to the last potato.
A wandering Sami people with their heard of reindeers on
the way to Scandinavia saved me.
For the Sami tribe, there is no border.
I took my old name back, Harry Finkelstein, a name I had kept
secret from Joseph, my friend from the bank robber days.
I got a job on the Manhattan project keeping tab of screws
needed to make a bomb, the rest is history.

— The End —