Drip
Drip
Strike one.

She is a zombie walking down
An empty hallway

Drip
Drip
Strike Two

Will I ever feel the same?

Life isn’t a game,
You can’t act like nothing happened.
I know you think that I can’t lighten up.
But there is no sunshine to remind me what light looks like.
You’re jokes just make it worse
Because I’m not here to play.

Drip
Drip
Strike three.

Sorry— that these are my raw emotions
I’m fine— it’s not like you care
It doesn’t matter— anymore

Faking smiles
And trying to forget.
Oh wait, that’s contradictory.

Drip
Drip
Silence.

sometimes
i feel like everything
i’m struggling with
is spiraling around me in circles

and the chaos of it all
overwhelmes me to the point
where it hurts to get out of bed
and my mom continues to ask what’s wrong
and my only response is that
i’m tired

i’m tired of not being in control
and i am tired of the solutions
being so incredibly close
yet when i reach out to grab one
it is just out of reach

i am tired of constantly being a mess
and i just want

r e s t .

Were you hit?
By a
Truck?

I think you’ve seen
Better
        days.

Not that I could
Say this…

What if:
        I came that night?

Do
You even
        want
To come?

How.
Would you     respond
                To me?

Well,
At least I
        saw you.

Things could have gone
       Much worse.

I’ll just
        wait
For next time.

He is back in the business
And I’ve seen it for myself,
But then why do I feel it’s not over?
Like this is the beginning
Of something with potential
To be good or bad.

I should feel like
Flowers, sunshine, and happiness;
I’m really not complaining
(You would know if I was).
But I’m still not convinced
By the smile on his face.

i just really really really want to talk to you
but
the words i want to say are not the ones you want to hear

Does he know how much I worry?
Of his hurting and his pain?
Does he realize that it kills me?
Every week he is still away?

Of course not,
I don’t share that stuff.
No, I still seem very alive
Each week I’m still bouncy.

What would happen if he returned?
And I asked the simple question?
Would he sense any of my concern?
And would he put the fear to rest?

I guess I’ll never know
Because I couldn’t do I anyway.
No; worry would fade to nothing,
And I’d be happy for the day