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Nobody talks about
the side effects of trauma.
The ones that make you
way too forgiving,
way too empathetic
to the point of putting
another's needs above your own.
Or maybe you'll do anything
to please people in hopes
they do not repeat the
trauma you so desperately
try to avoid.
Love me for me
or
Bow out gracefully
Schedule to leave me be
For the rest of infinity
If you're not going to do it discretely
And sever the ties neatly
I beg you to erase me entirely
Label me the falling tree
And I'll go quietly
Consider that a final promise from me
Or a threat if need be
Depending on if you need me to be the enemy
If there's any particular story
You're lookin' to re-weave back into your foggy memory
Then sure, feel free,
Go ahead and rewrite history

©2024
I don't need to whisper to my God
He is here beside me
And he is listening to what I have to say
Please let me win a little peace
Let me get out of this depression
Let me get out of this depression
Let me live again
Let me be myself again
It hurts me when I am not heard by others
I realize now that I can't always be the center of attraction
Because
Others need to talk also
I shouldn't do all the talking
But I do
Even though
I bored them all with my talking
I am not perfect
You have to understand that God
There are things I need to change
I don't need any more distractions in my life
I don't need any more violence in my life
God does it for me now
Give me a good night's rest
My mind is like a computer
Garbage out
Good thoughts in
There is plenty of misery in my life that you need to get rid of for me
I have to recognize the signs
I have to tell myself
I am angry
Give me peace of mind
Yes I carry the heaviest burdens on my shoulders
Somewhere I know love is waiting for me
Because I am
Holding back the tears
Imagine me being free from depression
What's going on inside my head?
I am calling for help
The sky is crying
God doesn't tear my clothes
God all it takes is a leap of faith
God take me to the river
I only have eyes for you God
God I am running out of lies to tell
God sugar spilled on the floor
What a mess it made
God hold me with your hand
God I need to use my imagination
God takes it to the limit
Feeling like half the man I used to be
I look to the sky desperately
Noticing something I don't usually see
The moon keeping the sun company
But the visual hit a little differently
Like I unknowingly unlocked some mystic mystery
Probably due to the particular mindset I'm in currently
But looking back at me was a half moon in all it's majesty
And I thought about it's cycle, it's personal journey
From full to empty then back again for all of eternity
Then my thoughts drift back to me,
Back to that feeling of illegitimacy
And this new found possibility
Based on the moon cycle imagery
Could it be something I could copy?
I guess I'll have to wait and see
But a sliver of hope, like the sliver of a crescent moon, may be all I need...maybe
Maybe I too could be whole again if I just move forward patiently

©2024
I close my eyes
To visualize
A romanticized
Big picture prize
Then realize
To my surprise
It's all been lies
And I have to comfort my soul as it cries

©2024
 Jun 5 Bekah Halle
Ayesha
No ceremony
Or invention
Convention
Ever stagnant

You, foul Country
Are my skin
You are not tunic
Not shalwar

Not the shame
With which I
Stiffle my chest
Not love

Fleeting,
Fumbling, flapping
Forced to sit
And forced to flee

Your tongue burns
As a curse
On my tongue
Your hands

Are *****
With my guilt
Your crime
Was me

Your tears seep
In pillow and they
Weep all night
On my face

There is no grief
In me to spare
You bring with you
Everything hot

You beat
As a breathing
Heart of fire
Your feet

Are defiant
Stained with a Henna
That is red as souls
Your wounds

Are flowers on my
Palms, your laments
****** in my wrists
In beauty, I

Return to you
You, the grotesque
Soil of my sprout
Your sins my scars

Your songs my scars
Your violent dances
Alive as tulips
And the love

That you make
Is borne of silence
Whispered, crime
Your law is grey

Your child looks
At me forever
And it moves
Like winds, it moves

Me, it disgusts
At me, and in there
It examines everything
The streets

In your stare
Are quiet and shut
All the jewels
Are jewels of shame

And I do not
Wear you like a flag
I do not rejoice
When you are green

Release me
Or do not leave
Tyrant, I love you.
You peasant, you fool

Your kisses are petty
Your weight frail
You sob like a railway
And all your people

Are dead.
They were running
To you, their homes
Behind. They

Were all running
For you. You reach
In the quiet for me
But I am bleeding

I have killed the sun
And the dawn is you
Sweet, haggard, lover
Of brisk touch and flame

Your massacre
Is my massacre.
Your foul decay
Is my blood.
18/04/2024
I've prayed for you
a million times
before I laid
my eyes unto yours

I've dreamt of this
for a thousand summers
before your sunshine
shone deep unto my abyss
 Jun 1 Bekah Halle
Betty H
I ride the waves of sorrow
to join eternal bliss
I await a kindly person
to plant a gentle kiss
what is joy
the
intervals of
soprano blue laughter
that
climb over
the
rainbows of happiness
that
dwell inside
of the
little boy soul
is
the
inside of joy
One night i dreamed i was a tree
Full strength and beauty within me
Though perilous storms hit the sky
My branches clapped quite high
And when i lost a limb or two
I grew stronger blooming new
Birds came to visit once to rest
Friends stayed and built a nest
Some leaves i just had to let go
They're old and new had to grow
I dreamed too much of that tree
As I burried the seeds it gave me
Sow Wisdom beauty and strength
I'll heighten to break free the fence

∴ Lyna Salman
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