Dark, crystal blue
Aquamarine
Tide pools that lie to the side of the sea
They carry the waves
People surf to feel free
But eventually they became
Like tsunamis to me
Your eyes held the sky
And all it’s potential
When you thought of me well
I deemed myself special
When raindrops fell from the clouds
And crashed on the ground
My eyes, like the earth,
Took them in safe and sound
From the day you arrived
I thought I was alive
Blue lightning lit up the gray in your eyes
If I were smart, I’d know better
Than to ignore the storms that it hides
And the winds that would influence
Every thought in my mind
You push and you pull
Until you get your way
And I let you take me
Out past the waves
When you let me go
I might have thought to swim
But with no end around me
I wouldn’t know where to begin
The ground seemed warm and inviting
I let myself sink under the water
But as the depth stretched out farther
I think it only got colder
Although I was thrashing around
I swore I was okay
I knew that by then you didn’t want me
But I insisted that I stay
By the time I stopped fighting
You were already gone
So I cried and I cried
And all that I saw
Was blue, shining blue
Bright, hopeful blue
The gift of the unknown tomorrow, blue
The only color I could’ve sworn that I knew
But it’s been a long time since that meant anything to you
And it was a long time
Before I realized I’d stopped breathing
I figured it’d be a longer time yet
Before I could feel my heart beating
For the first time ever
I wondered what was in your sight
When you looked at me
And your eyes held that light
I wondered if it had meant anything at all
Before I decided it didn’t matter to me
You were loving and you were hateful
But more than that, you were free
With you, I don’t know any more than I dream
So I won’t try to analyze
Any more than I see
I know blue, only blue
As b. l. u. e.
Written while listening to Fear by Sleeping at Last