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3.5k · Oct 2018
The Loner’s Girl
Gopika Krishna Oct 2018
A loner that kills pain,
physical pain and for some
a drug for joy, for calmness.
Magical, as a single strike eliminates all the pain.

The loner once struck me into a deep sleep,
where I was floating, like a dream
calmness or a silent blissfulness
I don’t know what this loner made me feel
I just know that it was beautiful.
Silence, silence all over
and then a sudden interruption,
my friend’s panic stricken voice
calling me, waking me up.
Looking up I found her scared eyes,
scared, as in whether I was dead.

A fear outspread that day,
people who loved me feared the loner,
there was solidarity in their fear,
fear of losing me.
The loner was banished, once and for all.

Days passed, years passed,
pain was calmed using wrapped pills.
It never gave the calmness,
the blissfulness like the loner.
He is gone for so long now.

Today, as my body starts to quiver with pain,
I heard his voice,
a soothing voice, asking me
asking me to open the cellar
“Take me and I’ll put you out of your misery”

As I opened, I saw the loner
beautiful in blue.
I took him and all of a sudden
I found contentment in this strike after so long.
Calmness flooded in me once again,
I found happiness in this silent blissfulness.
Silence, silence all over.
But this time my sleep didn’t get interrupted,
for this time it was now and forever.

Dolo, the loner,
now I’m yours….forever.
754 · Jun 2021
Grief
Gopika Krishna Jun 2021
The golden hues in autumn,
sheds down in the cold.
With an enduring hope,
it's spring again.
But with the unsaid goodbyes,
grief lingers.

-Gopika Krishna
543 · Jun 2021
Dream!
Gopika Krishna Jun 2021
With every long hair oil massages and
the long tea break on sunday evenings,
mother told me the stories that she lived,
rich with genres.
The ones with her siblings are my favorite,
but there are these little stories that she often repeats.
some brings a tear or two,
and she sips the tea and says what else she could have done other than accepting.
Even with the colorful, rich genres of stories, she never had a dream.
And everytime it makes me realize how much it means to have a dream.

-Gopika Krishna
413 · Oct 2018
My little black dress
Gopika Krishna Oct 2018
I saw you hanging in the dusty corner
Unnoticed and unwanted
I wonder,
I wonder how you ended up in there
I wonder why you were not given a place with the mains.
For you are beautiful;
with those frills in the short sleeves,
thick folds in the York
For you are beautiful;
with those thin material that you own,
two long big strips for a bow
For you are beautiful;
as how you makes me feel good, secure.
Except for those creepy stares on me, as if they finds curves on my skinny body.
357 · Oct 2018
The voices I hear
Gopika Krishna Oct 2018
Sitting here all alone...
Well, at least
I'm not totally alone
I hear their
shrieking voice
The voice of thirst
The thirst for me, my blood.

Sitting here all alone...
Well, at least
I'm not idle
I'm here scratching my body
Scratching like a maniac
Leaving red bruises on my skin.

Sitting here all alone...
With a rage to **** them all
**** them with my bare hands
The ones who have caused me pain.

The ones, the monsters
Mosquitoes.
328 · Oct 2018
The fight is real
Gopika Krishna Oct 2018
The fight is real,
fight to take control over you.
You, my friend
you have grown
you have grown to a higher level
and, in this level u possess a greater strength
now you have started to destroy me.

You were someone
who freed me from my regrets,
freed me from my anger,
freed me from my loneliness.
You were someone
who soothed me and I let you stay.
You made me feel that it’s ok to look back
and let me swim in you.
But now you have grown stronger,
you are pulling me down,
you have chained me,
you are clawing me deep,
deep into my soul.
I’m  drowning,
I feel suffocated when you **** that happiness that tries to pull me up.
Its hurts, my mind hurts
and now it has become physical...isn’t it?
I’m tired and I’m weak now,
at times I feel pain in every inch of my body
because of all those panic attacks you have created in me.

I don’t want you anymore.
What I want is a life,
I want to live, feel alive.
But you are trying to take it away,
you are trying to seek peace.
That peace a dead body possess.

This fight is real and it is mine to succeed
Because I started it
and I’m going to put an end to it,
an end to this toxic relationship.
You, Depression
You are no longer that friend of mine.
288 · Oct 2018
That girl in my workplace
Gopika Krishna Oct 2018
That girl
pleasant as her name.

She is that happy face
That we all want to see in the morning,
Her smile gives us the morning freshness.

She is that smart and hardworking one
Even covered with a pile of work,
I have never seen her complain like others do.

She is that friend that we all have
The child inside her is still alive
As she play around with her curly haired friend
even in middle of a hectic day.

They say everybody has another face, the darkside
But for now I have never seen that side of hers
For now, for me
Merin is the perfect name for her
Pleasant and full of life,
For she is real in this fake world.
151 · Jun 2020
IN THIS SPACE
Gopika Krishna Jun 2020
Too many things on mind,
too many things to say,
too many things to express,
in this space.

Space so big but poky,
poky as every movement,
every moment,
as everything is watched by a FANATIC.
132 · Sep 28
I want...
I want
the postcards,
travel plans,
the touch,
words of affirmation.
And I want you to
hold me while singing out loud at the concerts,
pull me close while kissing,
hold my hands in the silence,
sit by my side while sulking.
34 · Sep 28
Let me be
I used to do it all
But now
I’m tired
I don’t want to talk
go
do anything.
My mind is numb
my head is spinning
I don’t want to do it all.
Let me
just be
I don’t want to do it all.
Let me
just be
quiet.

— The End —