over and over
I think about someday
When I will see you again
When I can kiss your smooth skin
feel the warmth of your heart
Every second
is filled with your spirit
I still have questions though
guess I am just too messed up
but do you really love me
I know you have proved you do
many times
I told you everything
you still love me
I hope im enough
I dont feel like it
last night I asked
"am I worth of you love"
"yes, I wouldnt love you otherwise"
well, I love you
I dont know if I have proved that enough
I know that me still wanting to die sometimes
that must feel horrible
Baby im sorry
I still fantasize
I still remember
all of our warm hugs
all of out tears
all of our love
I think of what we had and have
it is so unique
just like you
you are perfect to me
I think of sleeping next to you
I get so many butterflys
my everything gets so warm
even right now
as im writing this
no editing
this is all from the heart
I love you.
help me,
I want to die
I want that knife
I want the lasting peace

I hate me
I hate how I have everything,
and I still feel like dying
I hate how I cant love her enough

I want to die
I want an end
I am sad
I am depressed
everything that should be happy,
just isnt

I need your help
I need something
I want to keep going,
but I want to die

I love her
She loves me
I have everything I have ever wanted
so why do I feel this way

I am empty
a void
I need help
I dont want to leave her

she is everything
I dont want to hurt her
I am scared that I will,
if I say that I still want to die
help me
A walk through life
left, 9/11
right, moon landing
above, Aliens
below, there's the devil

What is being said
we are a simulation
our lives are being controlled
our phones have been tapped

in this world
I have one question,
what isnt a theory

can you hear me
I said what isnt a theory

so speak to me
are you being told to say that?
am I programmed to write this?
whats your theory
If I could tell you everything
What would I say

Would I explain my love for you
No, thats impossible

Would I say im suicidal
no, not quite true anymore

What would I say...
My heart aches
My life hurts

When I see you
it goes away

how can you love me
I am so horrible

You are perfect
you are life

I still cry
but I know your by my side
I hope my love knows...
Alexander T Sep 6
my biggest fear,
losing you
What you might not hear
Alexander T Sep 6
I have waited years and years, and now that its here, I can wait no longer. I have needs and wants, I need-want you. and some how I know, I have time to wait. Live longer. My mind whispers, who is she to you?
She is everything
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