You sit beside me on the train,
Your hand reaches for mine as I feel your soft touch against my pale rough skin,
I look into your mesmerizing eyes and tell you that you are beautiful,
You chuckle as your cheeks glow bright pink,
People stare at me,
But no one seems to notice you,

I hold your hand as we stroll through the park,
Your innocent smile sending me into a daze of emotions,
Lighting a fire in my heart that burns full of passion and love,
The warm touch of your skin against mine,
And yet,
I still feel the cool summer's breeze blowing against my fingers,

After dinner we wander aimlessly enjoying each others presence,
Joke after joke,
Laugh after laugh,
We soon find ourselves at the front of my door,
I love you I say as I move closer towards you,
Your tender lips touch mine,
But I don't feel anything,

I wake up to you gazing into my eyes,
Your silky brown hair flowing elegantly with the calm breeze,
I look deep into your eyes,
Entrapped in a everlasting trance,
A tear rolls down my cheek,
The alarm clock buzzes,
The tune ringing in my ears until finally snapping me out of it,

After getting dressed into my black suit,
I slowly trudge towards the door,
The sunlight shines onto my skin,
But not warming it,
Only making it colder,
I enter the car to find a picture of you and I at our wedding,

As I start up the car engine,
Tears uncontrollably escape my eyes,
I reverse the car out of the driveway,

With my soul filled with darkness,
My heart full of sadness,
My body aching of pain,

I drive off to

**Your Funeral

All that I'll have is
beautifully scented sheets
and dented pillows

You spill your heart
I spill my dreams
Reaching for the stars
Your insecurities
Your eyes-like the sky
That the stars hide behind
Your stars-your scars
Keeping love in mind
You flirt-you cried
I long to hold you close-to fix you
Your forbidden love and
Thorns without a rose
It falls away quick
The chase is gone
Just as quick as you fell in love
Almost

Fingers locked
     in female hands
a riddle
   like legs     free of clothes
   crumpled jumpers
     in a corner
resembling a salad
of what-the-hell-went-on
last night   greeny-reds.

   Dolled up
bees' knees
     next time
not a person to     impress
or   dazzle   with a fedora
   top-shelf aftershave
charcoal-black shoes
gobbling     this week's wages.

Miss your     mouth
                              completely
see if you   tick
the thirty-one boxes
     know nail polish
     birthdays
better than second-hand
lips   and teeth   and tongues
   and lips
stash wit in a drawer
humour   under the bed.

Spot the odd   one   out
like finding a disease
     in a bloodstream
always observe
     an   owl   in the room
   watch others hurl feelings
I miss   you's   about
gobbledygook
resort to stories
     only your pillow knows
they want the     fire
not a                           lonely snowman.

Monsters are real.
But they don't live in our closets, or under our beds.
They live inside of us.
Sometimes they win.
Don't let your monsters win.

It was so
on that winter morning
that all the grass
and plants were still,
frozen in place by
the cold chill that rested
on our fingertips
and lashes
it was so
on that winter morning
that when you exhaled
the words
‘I don’t love you
anymore’
into the space
between us they
were accompanied by
a reinforcing cloud
of steam
and i could not fathom
how words that cold
could have been warmer
than the air
around us.