People think I'm mature enough to be called as an Adult.
Make-ups on, tidy looking clothes, all that matters are my outer appearance.
Fancy restaurants, pricey things, and luxurious car. It's what people think that would make every girl fall onto their arms.
Independent, superb cooking skills, tall and slim, it's what every boys hoped for to be their partner.
Throughout these years, I've lived my life, putting every of my sweat and tears to everything I do. Only fatigue piles up my days.

To this day, my messy hair, my bare face, as well as my comfy and casual wear, is what I have to be an adult.
Chilling out at a cute & sweet looking cafe, walking around the crowded city, shopping for useless stuffs, that's what I enjoy during my day.
I'm not good at cooking, I'm not that model looking body, and...
I'm stupid in love...

I'm sorry that I can't be the girl you wished for, I can't be the trustworthy  girlfriend that will shine your days better, for all I am..


                                                is just a Kid at Heart <3

When lamination slowly starts to creep
We weep
We seek
To release
We're meek
Helpless
Sleep sleeplessly
Terrible dreams
We seek what they mean
Froze
Stuck
In our lamination
Paralyzed in our dreams
Rainbows and unicorns were not in them
And if they were they were what led me to these nightmares
Nightmares when I try to run
Try to scream
Try not to stare at the rising sun
My lips blue
lying on the beach
Skin pale and sand smeared lips
Eyes unblinking
almost vacant, but not quite

There's still life!
My body rarely barely breathing
So still that it's eerie
My brown eyes almost vacant and unmoving
I know I'm there
I can hear the ocean
I can feel the morning breeze brushing my sand covered face and the strands of my hair
The problem is that it isn't me
There's no way I'm this beautiful or pale
Yes, I'm almost dying
But she's not me
Her skin is a white porcelain
Her eyes are the only thing of mine that's hers
Her hair brown
Her figure slim yet curvy
I'm in her body
I remembered
My body changed
But not my soul
This is me
The opposite of me
In a parallel universe who almost succeeded in what I did
*My soul was showing me what my other me did too

"Find something to **** and let it love you." - Barles Chukowski