I took up biking down past your street everyday.
I hope to spot you walking towards or away;
What would I do if you spun and said, Hi.
I'd get unbalanced if you looked in my eyes.
I remember how they turned red when you cried,

     Just leave me alone. Please leave me alone.
      I once loved you when we lived in our home.
      I'd have done anything when you were mine;
      Just leave me now and I'm sure I'll be fine.

This ride can never end for me.
I'll  pedal past the street haunting me.
I'll keep my head down as my wheels flee;
But I'll gaze in my mirror in case you call out to me.

I'm immobile
As my dentist blathers
On events and people
That don't matter.
I'd rather he just
Get IT done,
Leave rants and jokes
And silly puns
For one not in
His dental dungeon.
Today was his crowning glory,
When he'd finished needling me,
Before he filled my cavity,
He suggested
I see a cardiologist
To fill the hole
Found in my chest.

Cassandra

Roses are on the grave
The dolls are spread over the bed

Centuries have come
Centuries will go

Statues of the old times
Remind me of your face

The ashes dance across my lips
Your burnt flesh is a reminder

Of the pain, you left behind
When you left me there
In the rain...

The thought of ‘the one’ has overtaken my mind the past few days.

Is my person
The boy I met on the coast,
Wind swept,
Ocean eyes.

Is it the guy I found
At every house party,
Every single one,
And made sure we kissed each other as much as we could while using the excuse of alcohol.

The man who took me into the garden,
Onto a power box up the road where it was quiet,
And took my hand,
Ran his fingers through my hair,
And kissed the breath out of my chest?

I think I know.

Not hate,
Loss is a more apt opposite.
I don't hate.
Euphoria is distilled to misery;
Happiness trickles into sadness;
Delight drips to deflation.
Nope, I don't hate.
I'm lost, Love.

i search for you,
parts of you,
between thick smoke
and mixed drinks,
in dark faces shadowed
by moonlight

let me swallow your words
until my lungs are
filled
let me drink until
i drown

We were lovers for a day
you wanted us to stop by setting sun, to take a step back
i wanted us to keep going, to achieve new things together
but, the voice of reason cut in-between us
it warned me of the price to pay for going down my road
so, we were lovers for a day
and it was one of my happiest days

I'm stuck like a baby in a manger. And like that baby i have a lot of growing to do and lot's to learn. But right now i feel a burn. A burn inside like I've never felt before. I want to know. Will it change into gold or will it change to ash. It's still burning. I'm still scared of what I'll become. Right now i trust you. But I'm afraid that I'll be hurt again like from the women before you. I see you with him. Yet you're with me. It's all happening like before. It's like deja vu. The burning. It's getting stronger now. I see her laugh with him. Now my hope is falling down. For once i wasn't alone. But now that it's all happening over again i could never feel more alone. My heart is a heart of stone. You throw it hard enough it'll break even the hardest of bone. It's how I'm feeling. I want the pain to end. I don't want to give up. I've never felt love like this before. But the pain is everlasting. Idk if it's worth it. But for now i push on. I push through the pain. She's still by him. Now that it continues i feel so much shame. Now that it continues the burning is a searing flame. I feel myself burning away. I want to isolate myself every day. I want to sleep all the time. I wish it was eternal. It's the only time and place I truly feel inner peace. Please forgive me when I'm crabby and angry. I'm burning inside. Just know I'm still pushing forward. I'm still a nice guy. Don't let my kindness fool you. I'm in pain. So stay happy and lift eachother up. Because i want to be truly happy too. It's all i have left to gain from the stain of my burning pain.

It amazes me
that my grief for another
has been stronger
than that for my husband.

How can that be?
A fleeting love meaning more
than a marriage,
than a life together.

I realise that I already
grieved desperately, alone,
lost, confused
within the marriage.

The warmth of alone
encapsulates my every inch,
once again — I am washed over.


The little hands that graze
my face,
   my soul,
keep my heart beating
my skin alive.

alone in thought, but always seen by you —
your gazing up at me.

You do not know yet, nor will you ever…
but your laugh pulls me from the cold water;
but your eyes pull the water from my ever-seeking lungs.