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Karijinbba Dec 2020
When a man one adores
shows up a call girl photo card,
make sure you love him more
then you love yourself,
to let such sweetheart
true love best lover go,
like I let mine fly off.
My king understood love by his woman's  jealousy dinamics
shown for him. I understood love
by the trusting self assured
non jealous attitude owned.
So, for this kind of lover.
Fight for his love do cry!
Instead of letting this jeweled king
go to his call girls like I did because
his joy and happiness
was above and beyoud my own.
iI turns out he had given me all his love in written prenuptial contract and had no love for no other queen or slave or call girl to give her he was telling me he was my true love
only mine after two decades!
Foolish me was amnesic and couldn't speak up about the plot of his ancient prenuptial was since he told me
he was married and to never
look back  then he cursed me
to hate him from afar and move on;
which I did, but I didn't choose right .
I fell victim of human predators.
because his lyrics deceived my naive soul in youth I did not tell him I loved him and I lost his love.
slowly but sureky he took his Kammazutra back but I had my own
and just like him my lover brain sixty nine I give to noone I haven't found one worthy to be loved. .
It's disastrous and very foolish.
As I observe a lifetime after,
we both adored each other
in our own well intentioned ways
interchangeably even but other
forces conspire dod to wreck us up.
  without wanting to or knowing how.
We both understood love
in different ways;
this interpretation was
both our downfall my demise was only silence for in my mouth lips and words I had my cure to his live enchantment and end eternal love.
His Karma had pledged
in his Rhett Buttler past life,
he would search world wide,
or buy love if he had to,
but he was going to be loved
only in his way.
So we both lived out our destiny
but life was never the same
ever again as that which
was between us we were identical within m, twin flanes twin souls

Without him physically
my existance was like a dream.
more often like a nightmare.
I lost everything,
and everyone I ever adore.
like a house if cards it came
tumbling all down and,
it materialized even here on HP
since then I learned to close doors
to disconnect say good bye
but to my twin no good bye
it's impossible.
I feel blessed and cursed.
all in all I found misery and pain.
~~~~~~~
By Karijinbba 1974-95 & on.
https://youtu.be/v2BPSy5qbXg
g Jul 2017
now
i'm not speaking for everyone
just the ones
who are like me

it's not masochism
neither is it psychotic
but the pain we love
and the love we pain

for pain brings us
to new levels of understanding (the self, others)
to greater heights of seeing (the self, others)
to lower grounds with (the self, others)

p a i n
the dreaded four lettered word
l o v e
another dread in another day

the immeasurable love
that brings us
immeasurable pain
and yet we throw ourselves in

for what more can pain/love do
except to make you feel
                                          ...pain?
4:44AM thoughts.
Contrasted
Occlude
Nutation
Turntable
Reclusive
Apathy
Portmantea­u
Oedipus
Soliton
Inerrant
Tricorn
Inculcate
Ovoid
Nowhere

:/noun/ käntrəpəˈziSHən; A relationship between two indications when a Thing with affirmation of another are also a negation of the affirmation in the opposition of the other.

— The End —