My birthday—
the day I was born—
also feels
closer to my death.

Sad, yes,
I must admit.

No one will remember me.
I try so hard
to make others feel important
on their birthdays,
to remember them.

But when my beloved day arrives,
they forget the one
who remembered them.

Ungrateful!
Don’t they know
I placed them
on a pedestal?

And yes—
those on top
don’t look down.

Maybe that’s why
they don’t remember my birthday—
because I valued them
more than I valued myself.

When You Wake Up Tomorrow

When you wake up tomorrow
if I am not around, will you miss me?
If you never see me again
how much of a void will I leave in our heart?

Will you know how much I loved you?
will you truly know how much I cared?
nothing in this world mattered to me
more than being my best for you

I loved you with a pure love
that sprang up from a flawed heart
from within a flawed man
but my love for you was never flawed

But now this great gulf divides us
and it keeps getting wider
will I ever be able to reach you
to tell you one more time
that I truly love you
that I truly care

How I wish I could turn back time
if only I could start again
if only I could go back to the start
I would make it count

But what’s the point in worrying
about what can’t be changed?
I’ve already lived my life
If you could call it ‘living’

Now the only thing l can do
is to offer you the only gift I can
and that is my absence
hope it will bring you joy

The monster within seeks the light, In shadows deep, it craves the fight.
Painful gains, a heavy toll, Weakens body, burdens soul.
Freedom whispers, a distant plea,
Yet ingratitude’s reality,
A slave to self, forever bound, In silence, echoes all around.

Buried in darkness,
Accompanied by scent of metal and dirt,
No time given to discover colour.
But to toil on and on, day and night,
Supplying the fortunate doppelgänger with
All the needs to prosper.
Whether it knows or not,
That ****** beauty never fails to show.
Eyes of recognition solely
Centred on the fruit bearer where
It’s decorated with wonders of nature.
Though with flick of a finger,
It’s life will cease as the supplier
Has all the power in the world to
Go into strike.
Arousal of schemes powered by
Darkness about, that of light
Will shrivel into the fine dust,
Those that feed the void
Of Jealousy.

On top of my labour
In the farmyard
I often proffer you
Milk, cheese, manure and hide
To render grand
Your life,
Then how come
You express
Your gratitude
With a knife?

When you find me by choice cool
Mistake me not for a fool.

If there is a need for being cruel
I could over your eyes pull the wool
With out- heroding- herod's tool.

Unless imbeciles like you
Get a first hand knowledge
What is meant by
A gal-hearted revenge
Or inflicted damage
As goes the adage
"A ball in a China shop!"
They gloat creating
Many a wreckage,
Harbouring a grudge
They could never come to
The same page!

I see you,
Drinking from the water of inhumanity
Smoking the leaves of ingratitude
And eating the seeds of hypocrisy.

Observing you,
I found myself drunk of sorrow.

And it makes me,
Drink from the water of insomnia
Smoke the leaves of melancholy
And eat the seeds of solitude

So I can, finally,
Be drunk of madness

How can I believe
by light of stars,
the things you speak?
I can see it in your eyes
the wine
makes inhibitions weak.

In this light
I'm special.
But this eve I know
that tomorrow
I'll be hidden;
nothing will show.

The faith you see,
the trust you feel
won't hang upon the wall.
By sobriety of sunlight
you'll have
no need to call.

Intoxicate my brain.
But fire in my soul,
is not as high.
When no one
tends the glow
the embers die.

You, master
teach me
what forgetting is.
My back is turned.
I have no need
and nothing to give.