I'm curious. How does it feel to **** up two relationships in less than two months? I bet it feels ******* fantastic. Just don't convince the next ***** that you actually love her. Give her a heads up that you're all about the *** no matter how much you say "relationships aren't about *** for me" give her a heads up for me. Let her know she doesn't mean **** to you except some nice ***** and someone to complain to. Make sure she knows that the ring you show her wasn't bought for her. Don't give her Jacks ring because that'll make her feel special. It'll make her read into it. When we both know that she isn't special. Jack gave you that ring. Stop trying to give it away. Don't tell her that she's beautiful or sing her songs. Because that'll make her think that you actually give a **** what happens to her. When you know you really could care less. Don't tell her that she calms you down or helps with your ptsd because that'll make her feel important. It'll make her feel like she means something to you. When really it's just another **** buddy that you tell "I love you" to. And for Christ's sake. Don't tell her those three words if you're not sure with all of your being that you mean it. Don't tell her that you're scared to lose her when you're gonna walk away. Don't tell her that you had ******* nightmares about her leaving, when you were planning on leaving her. Don't **** her up any more than she already is man. Say what you mean and mean what you ******* say. Don't make plans with her that are far out in the future because that'll just **** up those days for her. Next time you see a ***** that you wanna ****, make sure she knows that's all it is. Don't tell her that you don't hurt people and that you're the one who is always getting hurt, because that's complete *******. Complete and utter *******. Don't lie to her about what you believe and then decide to tell her the truth once she is invested her whole heart in you. Unless of course, you don't care how many girls you **** up in the head. Because in that case, do all of those things I just said not to do.
Written 11.19.15
To the man I gave my all too, the one who I believed held my forever.