A small string of memory a connection to the soul still pulls at my heart

With each year that passes it recedes and reclaims space in my mind like the rise and fall of the tide

She left me to drown herself in tragedy and the tears of her childhood  looking for more of what broke her

We would've been a beautiful struggle a dysfunction to last a lifetime ironically I write about longing for what broke me.

We are the same

It was a fear from long ago.
A corner stone of a foundation, dysfunctional.

How you served me and kept me safe
All those growing years.
Thank you for your service.
Thank you for your protection.

Today, with heart and mind
United with intent
I rubbed my hands together
Allowing your energy to grow
And grow and grow
Until it circles between my hands
large and full.

Then with the breath in
Holding on to the stillness.
I see the change.
Ask in prayer. Then give the command.

Breathing out and letting you go with gratitude
As I lifted my hands open to the heavens
My fear floated up toward the Light.
Forever shifted. For ever changed. Forever Transformed.

"What,  you just love me
and then move on..
is that what you do?"
They weren't steps away from her
they were paces

and in an instant, the arrow flew

There is a seam,  
if you are able to see
as there are terracotta dreams
from which

we were  all  meant to be freed

Broken shards  fell to the ground
and inside of every single piece

     is all of the 'hers'
     she thinks that  she needs to be

Not sure if it is the aim
or  the flight  of the arrow
that brings about the aloneness
of an unspeakable,  heart sorrow
and these.. the sufferings of hell.

     Chloe is not dead--
     because  left standing
     when all else fell
     is her spirit's core,  now glowing;

     ..no longer hidden  
     within the confines
     of her terracotta shell.

Ah, beautiful Chloe
baby, there were times..

                remember knowing?
      The water-well;
      ..its  never-ending flowing.

      Believe again in that, my beautiful

              not  the shell.
--Anything is better than this hatred.

         I'm looking forward  to
         an eternity, spent in hell.