I cut myself again tonight
But I will never tell you
I wish never to fight

I love you dearly,
But I do not want
Your sorrow and pity.

You'll blame yourself,
I know you will.
I promise I won't **** myself.

You have no relation
To this dark habit.
It is but my own creation.

It does not help.
I know, I know.
Right now, it's living hell.

*** without being in love
Another ghostly counterpart
to fill myself up
Says my body is lovely, my sounds are art
Can't see way I knocked over my cup
On purpose to distract him,
I needed it to end
I stopped having fun
6 months ago in a room in Boston
I thought I was filling the void
With attention,
A habit I learned in early
Adolescence
I was making it bigger
Confusing my soul
The men I sleep with are empty and foul
*** without love
Is an act of sin,
Not according to God
But to the person within
Myself, I am sorry
I give up on it
*** without love
Feels meaningless

Virginia, you're a state of mind
A young girl with tussled hair and a warbling voice,
I would've enjoyed kissing someone so kind

But now Virginia, I believe we've both abandoned those thoughts
I can't seem to find you anywhere in this building or this head
Loping along, I wonder if you've drifted off

It means so little, you're late afternoon confession
It's easy to stand around and wonder what could've been
When I ought to be working towards my unsteady profession

Virginia, you're a whim on the wind
One that I dare not belittle or forget or act upon
I hope what you said wasn't meant to make me bend

I was with my boyfriend today.
When i started crying randomly he got confused and tried to comfort me..
But he couldn't
Cause i can'ttell him what's wrong..
He'd just be dissappointed that i feel worse again and that i lost 3 kg in a week.

I can't dissappoint him like that..