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  May 2016 summer
gray rain
Stop acting
like you don't
give a ****;
I know you do.
stop bringing me d
                                o
                             ­   w
                                n
further than I already
am. Don't push me in
the hole I'm f
                         a
                            l
                              l
 ­                               i
                                ­  n
                                     g
in anyway, without your
help. Stop pretending
your life has no meaning
and trying to be like me.
you can smile and be
happy whilst I am still
empty. Nothing makes it
better and you trying to
understand doesn't help.
Just STOP!
You will never get it, you
just puncture; making
things                 worse.
letting                 me stand
with a                 hole in my
body                   and all the
pain but nothing leaving.
summer May 2016
me,
worthless,
stupid me,

myself,
no one cares,
why should they,
i don't,

I,
can't do it anymore,
it's getting too cold,

me,
silly,
dumb me,

myself,
i hate myself,
and so do you,
i know it,

I,
am over it,
the voices in my mind
  May 2016 summer
Maddii Lloyd
If I were to run, where would I go?
Who would I see?

Would I be safe and sound?
Or in danger risking my life?

Would I still be me?
Or would I create a new identity?

Would I still love you?
Or would you not exist?

Would I still have these scars?
Or would fresh ones appear?

Who would I be?
Where would I go?
summer May 2016
I knew i shouldn't have gotten close,
shouldn't have risked everything,
to make you happy,
to be there for you,
only to have you hurt me,
it started like a dream,
a girl like you,
confident and willing to talk to me,
despite my looks and my thoughts about myself,
i remember the days we spent,
sitting and talking,
laughing and smiling,
talking about art,
about flowers,
about our different taste in music,
it's okay because i wanted to be near you,
i wanted you to know me,
like me,
but then things changed,
you changed,
your jokes began to get more real,
too painful for me to bear,
i started to get upset,
feel things i never felt before,
you,
you shouldn't be having this effect in me,
you,
i love you,
a little too late for that,
a little too late for everything,
you moved on,
did i mean anything to you?
did you love me?
the way i loved you,
did you feel the same?

i guess not,
you moved on,
as if i was nothing but a chapter,
in your book,
i tried,
i tried to move on,
soo badly i wanted something more,
than to feel this craving for you,
and to know,
i couldn't have you,
i tried to listen,
to the other girls,
tried to take my mind away from you,
but it always,
always came back to
you,

i heard them,
but i wasn't listening,
all i could really hear,
was your voice,
and the last thing you said to me,
sorry,
a stupid little word,
sorry,
i ****** up,
sorry,
i wasn't enough,
sorry,
you had to leave,

what's the point anymore,
of anything,
of caring for you,
only to have you use me,
what's the point,
on wanting love again,
wanting someone else,
for them to do the same thing,
find someone better,
leave me,
without telling me,
and break my heart,

yes,
you broke my heart,
yes,
it will take a while,
yes,
i still think about you,
yes,
this is all too painful,

i message you,
i waited and waited,
for your reply,
my eager little heart,
thinking maybe you will say something else,
but no,
all you said was sorry,
i thought that maybe,
i would feel something from it,
feel closure,
let it go,
but it didn't,
these feeling won't go away,
and i need them to go away,
please,
can you just,
go away,

I knew i shouldn't have gotten close,
shouldn't have risked everything,
to make you happy,
to be there for you,
only to have you hurt me,
i wrote this poem on request from a friend. he was going through heartbreak. we share the same story, the same pain, the same ache and desire for the person who left us. i thought i would help him get it out of his system, so i wrote him this poem. but i didn't think it would have a huge effect on me. but it did. so here it is, our shared heartbreak story.
summer May 2016
on the verge of tears,
i try to help a friend,
on the verge of tears,
you are my only end,
on the verge of tears,
i can't do this anymore,
on the verge of tears,
i know i haven't won the war,
on the verge of tears,
your in my mind again,
on the verge of tears,
i feel all this pain,
on the verge of tears,
i will always love you,
on the verge of tears,
you didn't love me and i knew,
on the verge of tears,
i thought i was past this,
on the verge of tears,
i miss your kiss.
  May 2016 summer
Star Gazer
She's a very honest soul,
A brave soul without care.
She will tell you of her day
so listen to the words
she speaks.
She will hide things,
But she will tell you
When you feel like
Listening.
She won't ever force
You to say anything
Or ever force you
To do anything
For her.
She's beautiful,
Smart, creative
and definitely
caring.
She's able to bring up
any topic to talk about
so awkward silences
are non existent with her.
When you look into her eyes
If you haven't fallen in love
You definitely will.
There's a shine that
is indescribable.
The moon light can't compare
To the shine that glimmers
in her eyes.
If you can make her look
at you with that shine,
consider yourself a lucky man.
You will never find an angel
Who will be able to care
While at the same time
Make you laugh without a care.
Cherish her every second
Cherish her every moment
Because you have won the lottery,
Love her with all your heart
and make her happy.
If I could pick someone to be
With right this moment,
I would pick her.
So you should realise
Just how lucky you are.
You definitely do not
want to lose her.
Watch as the sun rises and sets
And you'll realise,
Her beauty is way beyond
Any of that.
Make her happy for me,
I just want you to make
her smile.
                 Love her
Like I never had
                 The chance
to.
  May 2016 summer
Yanamari
Losing your sense...
Of         purpose
  Is ..       .
Painfully painless

Why is ..     .... . that
so?
A contradictory  statement.
Because...
To lose someone or something
   dear to you                                  
is painful
And
to lose hope or devotion to something or someone
Is
Also
Painful
And yet...                                 .     .             ...
And yet
With the meldin..g
Of these two heart pieces
Pain becomes painless,
And even so,
Painlessness is a state
That a purposeless person
Never achieves.
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