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a sign from you
and I stop
a word from you
and I smile
a gaze from you
and I tremble
a caress from you
and I melt
Liquid ahead of you
you're all colors in one
you're  my compass
you're my center of gravity
you're my nirvana
when you're there
everything
is intense
every color is vivid
every sound is shrill
the sky is infinite
the green is more green
everything is easier
everything finds its own place
nothing  is impossible
you're the best of me
without you
everything is flat
the music in me
turns off
disorder and impatience
mark
the faint gust of life
gliding beside me
without being able to brush me
a slow
ticking bottom
accompanies the wait to
the prelude
the symphony of music
and perceptions
of your return
and everything
can start again
and I can fly
a faded picture
consumed by hopes
softly entrusted
to the wind
a music
far and slight
played by a record
scratched by dust
and time
as the weight of your naked body
over mine
it is now the oppression on my chest
for the lack of  who
should touch it
as the beating of your heart
under  my face
rubbed on your skin
rough and hot
it is now the  arid ticking
of a clock
that relentlessly  articulates
the minutes of our us
without you
as your scent
harsh and intense in my coilings
in my flesh
it is now the salty smell of my tears
impregnated into a pillow
cold and crushed
by the weight of my desolation
as the strength of your back
who supported  my weakness
it is hard today
the regrets wall against which I slam
to escape from the fog
as  your sweet whispers
slipped on my skin
in my hair
it is now icy and lonely
the breath of the night
that  invests me with its petty hissing
as your soft caresses
that insinuated  into my expectations
burned by your touch
it is now violent the hassle
of a  crumpled sheet
that brushes me
wilted and warm
of an unknown  heat
my eyes closed
I meander
lost and exiled
in thoughts imprisoned
in the pages of a diary
tattooed on my skin
until the penultimate page
and then again from the first
in a circle
vicious and delicious
of passion and love and obsession
who lives and relives
until the dawn of a sunset
that should never get
until a last page
deleted
don’t read the end
there’s a fight
inside me
my heart against
my mind
my feelings against
my rationality
my body against
my own limits
me against
me
I love you
I want you
I need you
I give up
to you
and I win
and I lost
my heart bleeds
my body trembles
my eyes would like
don’t look
I'm afraid
but I don’t stop
I suffer
but I continue to fight
I don’t give up
to the injuries
I don’t give up
to weariness
I don't give up
to terror
I shout out
NO!
I'm not into it
I shout out
NO!
I want to be able to choose
It’s my law
it's my duty
I love me
I love life
I love color
I love music
I love dancing
I love talking
I love listening
living
laughing
playing
loving
accepting diversity
knowing
crying
choosing
I say NO!
I'm not scared
raw as a rock
crushes me
mighty like a meteorite
hits me
invincible as a bottomless
spiral
drags into the abyss
my fatuous beliefs
revealing
withered silhouettes
and
desolation
addicted
turning on you
you’re more toxic
than ******
scroll fluid
in my veins
you're dangerous
a sweet poison
harmful to my health
I fill myself with you
of your essence
every fiber of me
wants to feel you
your voice
your words
your smell
your hands
your mouth
light me up
and raise me
to dizzying heights
and they throw with me
in adrenalin
descents
that leave me breathless
you’re never enough
darkness takes you away
and I’m  in withdrawal symptoms
you’re  hot oil
in my veins
burn
my nervous system
my heart
is covered with pus
a thin and  unquenchable
itchy
crawls under my skin
my brain cells
seeking frantic
satisfaction
in wrinkles of memory
dig every corner
crave a drop of you
forgotten on  the bottom
of an empty bottle
you’re toxic
abstinence
doesn’t give me  peace
I’m alienated in a whirl
of strobe lights
sweat
dehydrated
confused
find me
take me
save me
fallen
in  a reality
made of cubes
huge cold cubes
your dreams
shot down
by inability
by ineptitude
by your limits
defined by the black voice
of a giant nobody
shouting
your occured
conscious mediocrity
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