It's hard to share my past;
Pain, flaws, and secrets
With my new girlfriend
‘Cuz soon,
When my love for her
Is at its pinnacle
And wants to take it
To the next level,
She's going to leave me
Like the one before her
And the one before her
With all that I revealed to her
And I'll be left with
More pain, flaws, and secrets
To share with the next

One foot in my future path
The other one in my past
Two lives before me
At the crossroad

One pushes me
Into the land of prospects
The other holds me
like I have unfinished business

One is a path I’ve known
The other, I’m yet to explore;
Clean the slate and start afresh

Memories hold me back
But new ambitions push me away
Forever is not my place here

But for now, I’ll be still
For a short space of time
Deciding what's best for me
And me, and me!

This pain smacks within me
I burn from within like tilapia
On the grill grate
The world consumes me
Piece by piece, roasted!
But my face has to maintain
An erratic smile
I defend, “everything is ok”
Until
Someone sees it as it is—
A necessary lie

And there are people
who don't want
to be remembered
even for what
they’re good at
They want to fade away
like they never existed

Kindly try once more
Just like you did heretofore
And the one before

And when I leave,
I wish to go just like I lived
Don’t worry
You won’t miss me
You won’t remember a thing
It will have zero effect on you
Cuz’ all these years,
I’ve been nothing to you
Leaving won’t change anything—
Just as I came
I will leave the same
Alone. Empty. Nobody

Sweats have turned blood
My legs are weak
Temporary turning me *******
I can no longer move
Not a single step forward

My sorrow overwhelming, consuming
I've travelled alone, left alone
Hopelessly helpless in my journey
In this tunnel of depression
I'm condemned to suffer forever

But wait!
I see something
I can finally see
the end of the tunnel
from where I worthlessly lie
Greeting me with a shiny light
As bright as sun

Light, they say is hope, assurance, intrepidity,
life, end of darkness, new beginning...
Help is here!
The suffering is almost over
The curse of an unending loneliness
Is broken, perhaps

Find me strength
To drag myself once more
To endure the pain one last time, hopefully
Yes! Light!
It brightens per each pace I move

But what if it is a train approaching?
What if it's only a figment of my imagination?
Just like the last time - countless times
It makes things worse each time, quite deceptive
And yet, it feels, like them all