i remember the way love used to taste
it crept up my sternum, crawled up the back of my throat, strangled my tongue, and leaped out of my mouth with a trembling, shaking "i don't know how to feel like this anywhere else so please let me stay"
although there was an eviction notice stuck in between the door and the frame but i didn't open the door, to leave, to see it
and i used to look at people who could find something good and run from it and wonder how they could possibly do that when i ran to every doorstep, pleading for someone to let me in and planting my feet firmly into their ground as soon as they did
there are pieces of myself in every corner of these rooms, every crack in these walls, clumped in bathroom sink drains and i understand now
the more love you give that is unrequited, the less you have to give out again

and i'm only a few drunken, empty i-love-you's away from running dry

Behind my luring silence

lies the inevitable fate.

You're mind is swirling with your thoughts

you're looking for an escape.

I'm a ticking bomb with a smiling mask,

Go ahead and touch me

I will blast.

All we both need to do is start a conversation.

Sooner or later,

I will be your biggest addiction.

I love destroying you slowly

torturing you brings a smile on my face.

You can't see me clearly

but it's how I was made.

You're the only thing which can save you from yourself.

but its too late

You were dead when the darkness fell.

Strain your ears,

you can hear the sirens

You were your biggest fear

and you needed my guidance.

I'm a falling stone in a world of glass,

all this time I was the devil behind your smiling mask.

Waiting on the other side of a screen,
                          
                              ­       Hoping you'll send me a message.

Seconds tick by...
                                  Minutes tick by.....

                                                        ­                Hours tick by....
                            
Then I realize.

                                              There is no one on the other side.

                                                          ­                        
*Never was.

give me a break
from the seas rough
I greed a bellyache
badly need to laugh!

for too long weathered
a stormy bumpy ride
I need a breather
bare a guffaw wide!

give me a break
give me a break
life is burdened enough

give me a break
not give a heartache
I badly need to laugh!

been too long bowed down
with the pangs of grief
needs himself this clown
a laugh’s relief!

long buzzed this head
with the groans of pain
this heart has bled
time and again!

*give me a break
give me a break
life is burdened enough

give me a break
not give a heartache
I badly need to laugh!

To a stuffed full of happy Thanksgiving!
I see a very very merry Christmas!
Coming!
With what I ate today,
If I could grow a long white beard,
get someone to sew me a red and white outfit,
paint RJ's nose red, superglue him some antlers,
find some elves- they are plentiful
down in the projects-
I will be the perfect Santa.
I promise to work for free.
And stuff your stockings
full, my Dear!