RIP -A Poem For Leelah Alcorn
Do not tell me
that it gets better
when another one of my
people another one of
my sisters
and surely thousands of brothers
but this sister
who I didn’t even get the
chance to meet
this sister
whose blog I only knew about
thanks to her suicide note
this sister
whose parents can’t even respect
her pronouns after she is dead
they did not lose a son
they drove a daughter
their daughter
to end her life
and even after her body
is not yet cold in the ground
still call her son
your darling son died years ago
and now your daughter is dead too
and she isn’t coming back
this isn’t an accident
I know what suicide looks like
I have almost been a victim many times

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when my sister is dead
and she is being misgendered
in the news articles and media

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when she
Leelah Alcorn
that is her name
was pushed to suicide by an
uncaring un-understanding world

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when my sister is dead
and her parents still have the nerve
to beg for sympathy and call
her a boy
even after death

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when we are still killing ourselves
only to be written off as mere statistics
and gender-identity
sexuality in and of itself
still isn’t taught in schools

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when my sister is dead
and I cannot attend her funeral
all I can do is write ****** poetry
and hope that she forgives me for not
being able to speak around the lump
in my throat

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when countless people that were
born in the wrong body
that do not fit the norms
will be misgendered at their funerals

Do not tell me
that it gets better
because the harsh reality is
that thousands of us will
live life in fear
drowning in a hopelessness
and sadness that nobody else knows
because not all of us have accepting
families and friends
and our suicides will be written off
as mere accidents
but nobody steps in front of
a semi on accident

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when my sister died knowing
thinking knowing thinking knowing
that her parents didn’t love her
they loved their son
they will mourn their son
when it is their daughter that died
and she will never know a true mothers and fathers love

Do not tell me
that it gets better
when the harsh truth is that
if I do not change my name legally
I too will be
misgendered at my funeral

Do not tell me
that it will get better
when my sister is dead
unless you want to feel the wrath
of my transgender rage
over the injustice that is written across the scars on our wrists and signed on the dotted lines of our suicide notes

Do not tell me
that it will get better
because my sister died not
knowing that

Blessed be the transgender one,
Gave up on life to seek the sun,
Bigoted parents, insidious friends.
Her heart be broken and so it ended.
This girl believed she didn't matter.
Conformed to societies issues,
Everyone said she was meant to.
The vicious encounters of supposed normality,
Bought you to your desperate knees.
You have your wings now.
Fly sweet child be young and free.
Rest in peace, in sweet relief.
(C) LIVVI
DEDICATED TO  LEELAH (Josh Alcorn)
The Ohio transgender teenager who committed suicide, in response to prejudice.

Leelah, I don’t usually write poems for people I never knew
I don’t usually write poems on the big issues, the things I haven’t studied, and the things I’m new to learning about
I can’t claim to know anything about you
In the seventeen years you were on this Earth, I had never heard your name
And even if I ever met you, there’s a good chance I still wouldn’t know your real name
That I would be introduced to you as Joshua and I wouldn’t have thought twice
Leelah, I haven’t seen much of you and I’ll never get the chance to
To me, you are one selfie in a cream colored dress captioned with a suicide note that I wish no one had ever had to read
The only words of yours I’ll ever know are the last ones you chose to give to the world
And any other information I could find will only tell me where the world stands on the events that lead to your death
I know that your parents bound you too tightly in blue baby blankets that you wanted to bleach white and toss in with the red laundry until it matched the assignment you wish you had from the beginning
I know that isolation and abuse took its toll on your health until your self-prescribed remedies left you standing on Interstate 71 at 2:20 on a Sunday morning
I know that more journalists misgender you than get it right but people are finding the best links they can to tell the world who you are
And they’re sharing your words on all forms of social media
Leelah, you’ve sparked a movement
You said that you wanted your death to mean something, and darling, it has
Progress shouldn’t have to come exclusively from tragedy
But it often does and you deserve to know that your tragedy is leading an advancement
The words that never should have had to have been written in the first place, at least are being read across the world
”The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights”
Leelah, in a google search bar your name is the first result after just three letters
And even when someone types in Joshua Alcorn the whole first page of results is titles that name and gender you properly
Leelah, they’re getting better
They’re finding the breaking points in their ignorance and instead of supergluing the cracks they’re chipping them apart to find the roots of the weakened foundation
Things aren’t what they should be, but skipping stones are becoming stepping stones and hopefully the waters will hold enough of them to support the feet that are trying for the first time to cross over
And hopefully next time there won’t be blood in the water because
Leelah, you deserved so much better than the life you were given
But you’ve given life to new voices and they’re remembering your name and they’re saying
Leelah, we stand by the same things you believed in and now we’re taking your words to the streets
And you are loved and you are missed, but right now it’s important that you are known
And you are known as
Leelah
And you will not be forgotten

The fear of the same.

why does my happiness affect you?
Why do my pictures and comments spark hate?
Why do you feel the need to put me down about my life?

It's the way I am!
It's the way I've been!
It's the way I will be!

Call me queer,
Call me gay,
Call me bent,
I DONT ******* CARE!

Your insults aren't insulting!
Your words are useless!
You try to bring me down by labelling who I am?
That's pathetic.

So let me ask again,
Why does my happiness affect you?

So much so that people get hurt!
The community stand tall!
Taller than religion,
Taller than the government,
Because we follow our hearts!
And not fairytale's and scripts!
We live a life we choose,
One which makes us happy.

Your bible supposedly accepts everyone?
So why did my friend feel the need to **** herself because of you!
She was happy,
She was smart,
But you put her down!
You drove her to depression,
And for what?
After all I thought that God creates everyone?
So why create a transgender who is not to be accepted?
It's a bit stupid if you ask me!

She is in our hearts,
Always,
Religion means nothing,
And shall no longer hinder our happiness,
R.I.P Leelah Alcorn

You murdered your daughter and you show no remorse
Then you hide behind a cross, of course
‘Cause you think your religion is a license to hate
And an excuse to discriminate

Her short life was done
Before it had begun
‘Cause you murdered your daughter
But you still call her your son

You sent her to monsters dressed in therapist’s clothes
‘Cause her comfort is something you oppose
When she told you her secret, you replied, “It’s a phase
And you’ll feel like a man one of these days”

But of course, she did not
Now I won’t let it be forgot
That you murdered your daughter
Without a second thought

And she was beautiful
Yes, she was so beautiful
But she had no chance with parents like you
Though she was beautiful
Though she was so beautiful
You cut off her wings long before she flew

With the guise of a gay man as a small stepping stone
She hoped she would not feel so alone
But instead, you denied her all her friends at her school
How can you be so selfishly cruel?

You locked her within walls
But her gender’s not your call
Yes, you murdered your daughter
You drove her to end it all

But she was beautiful
Yes, Leelah was beautiful
And yet, you denied her identity
She was so beautiful
She was so **** beautiful
But you were too hateful to let her be

Now, Douglas and Carla, let the world know your names
And the sins of which you’re not ashamed
You did not love your daughter, don’t you act like you did
You probably didn’t see her as your kid

Don’t pretend that you’re sad
You’re not a mom and dad
‘Cause you murdered your daughter
For the son you never had

and we asked you for help
and you laughed at the candor
and we dropped dead like flies.

****** t-shirts falling from
clothing lines as clothing pins
litter the floor of the morgue

and parents pick out caskets
ten sizes too small, for dead
babies and children of the

night, the ones who had been hanging
from street lights and shooting stars,
who asked for help in the form

of loud music, slow dancing,
painting in dark colors, tying
red balloons to doorknobs,

and leaving home without layers.
these children, they’re wearing t-shirts
in late december and you’re

wondering why they’re shivering.
in the mean time, you turn your cheek
and lift the zipper of your fur coats.

S = Sweet & or a Sensitive Feminine Female
T = Totally a Feminine Female
A = Absolutely a Feminine Female
C = Cute & or a Caring Feminine Female
I = Intelligent Feminine Female
E = Excited & or an Enthusiastic Feminine Female / Girl / Woman    -      -                 At & For the Present and Into the Future  
      
*********

L = Loving & or a Lovable Feminine Female
E = Ear's Pierced , Tired of Clip On's , ( The Pain & Torture )
E = Entertaining HRT , ( Hormone Replacement Therapy )
L = Leelah ( Picked & Dedicated in Memory of ) - (  Leelah Alcorn )
A = All About Helping & Being There for Other's
H = Honoring ( Leelah Alcorn's ) Final Request , Too Not Let Her -                -                         Death be In Vain - ( 11/15/97 to 12/28/14 )

********

C = Cuddle able & Caring Feminine Female
H = Hair That is Eventually Long & Very Beautiful
E =  Eye's That See the Good in All People
Y = Young at Heart & A Very Beautiful Feminine Female
E = Eating Healthier , So I can Maintain a Feminine Female Figure
N = Nylon's & Tights , Beautiful & Truly Make My leg's Stand Out
N = No Body and or ****** Hair at All
E = Excited About the Future , Of Being the Feminine / Female / Girl     -
            I Hope Too be in the Future

*********

            GOD BLESS YOU "" ALL ""

When I was fifteen I listened to a religion teacher say
“Maybe” there should be a queer holocaust
and I pretended it didn’t hurt me,
the same way I pretended when she said
trans people mutilate their bodies by becoming who they are
when she misgendered Leelah Alcorn
when she called asexuals freaks of nature
when the other queer kid got sent to therapy
for having the audacity to even try to start a GSA
and suggesting that maybe everyone deserves to feel safe here
and my friends
think I’m overreacting
“It’s not a big deal!”
“Get over it!”
“Stop trying to be so special,
you should be expecting it at a Catholic school,
this is just what religion is like”
Is it?
Head down
Head down
Voices down,
you can get expelled for disagreeing with the archdiocese
Whisper in the hallway
about all the girls with pregnancy scares
who believed that
love
was the best contraceptive
Is that what Jose Gomez is teaching us?
No it doesn’t hurt
to watch my friends cry
about boys who yell “******”
down high school hallways
No it doesn’t hurt
when my friend asked me
“what would your kids even call you?”
No it doesn’t hurt
to be like this
Or at least
I can pretend it doesn’t

Sometimes we feel like it's time to give up.
There's really nothing more to say.
Words have no meaning,
when our spirit has been broken,
and there's no more strength to fight.
People will say,
things will get better, they always do.
But they don't always get better,
sometimes they get worse,
just ask Leelah Alcorn.

The world at times feels like a weapon.
A weapon designed to **** the free spirit,
crush anything different,
non conformity is the enemy,
and it must be hunted and destroyed.

But who makes those rules,
politicians, teachers or churches,
or is it as simple as parents,
too concerned with what neighbors will say.

Whatever the reasons, no matter the cause,
the results in the end are the same.
Another statistic to add to the list,
Another sweet soul lost.

by Lj 2016