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sleeplessnxghts Dec 2013
Tiny embers escaped the crackling fire and latched onto your pale skin
And when you felt the warmth you expressed immense gratitude towards the fire itself, though it were the embers hard work creating the fire
Despite the lack of appreciation they continued to burn up to you and provide the same connotation

Pastoral sunsets descended over the Hudson River, reflecting a palette of vibrant colors along the ripples in the water
And when you recognized the beauty of the picturesque scenery, you praised New York City as if it copyrighted the sunset itself
Although you disregarded Mother Nature's creation that spreads worldwide, the sunset stayed out a moment longer to say goodbye

Crashing salty waves echo inside your eardrums, peacefully sending you into a deep sleep
And as you fell asleep with such ease, you showed appreciation of the refreshment you felt wash over you as a slumber awaited, though it was the recurring sounds that sent you there and not the images inside your head
And aside from the depreciation the waves feel, they continue to undulate eternally, just to help a sleepless soul in need

Why is it, that you disregard the true giver of your happiness and show love elsewhere?

Broken glass pinches the skin on the underside of your toe and blood is drawn as the sting induces pain
And once the painful sensations begin, you curse the shards of glass and claim them to be the bane of your existence instead of blaming the drunken incompetent who dropped his bottle on the hardwood floor
But in a tiny squeak of movement, the broken glass apologizes but you fail to tune your ears in to the "sorry's" from the things that you hate most

A dead-end book confuses your brain that requires finite details, and anger rises up to your fiery eyes as you throw the book across the room, praying it'll burn to ashes
You failed to realize it is not the book's fault, it is the author who wrote it, but you relentlessly blame the pages and the ink, despite their endeavors in providing you with entertainment and adventure

Scorching steams held in the air above your coffee mug, you burn your tongue with the taste
smashing the mug to the ground is your idea of revenge against the execrable caffeine drink itself for being too hot
You did not choose to place the blame on yourself, for you boiled the coffee and saw the steams before you took the first sip
Although it's now splattered across the floor, the steams still wish to provide a delightful scent of hazelnut to calm the nerves that are frantic in your temples

Why is it, that you disregard the true cause of pain by blaming the non-blameworthy?

(It seems as if you cannot take responsibility for your own actions when things run amuck, but when things are delightful, you thank everything but the real reason for it's loveliness?

Is that why every detail of our love was never noticed by you, as you only loved what I could do for you?
Is that why my new perfumes never made a new impression, but you always blamed my beauty on the dress that hung over my lifeless body?
Is that why when I broke your heart you blamed me for everything that went wrong, failing to acknowledge your complexities and flaws?
Is that why a call is never returned and words are not exchanged because you poured out every negative aspect of our relationship as being my faults and deemed them the downfall of our love?
Is that why I am never enough and would never be enough for anyone?

Is it?
The scars.
I am covered in them.
The burns
The cuts
The scratches
The bruises
The peeled off  flesh and nails.
They are my t r e a s u r e s.
They show all of the battles inside of my head that I have lost.
They show all of the anger, pain, depression, envy, remorse, guilt, shame, insanity, emptiness, boredom, and tiredness I feel.
They show all of the words I am afraid to say.
They hold all of the I l o v e yous, I h a t e yous, I n e e d yous, and I feel
your p a i n s that I am afraid to even t h i n k at times.
They peek out from underneath my clothing and they rub against everything, reminding me that I am indeed alive and that I am indeed h u m a n.
They show all of the times I've screamed
Been alone
Been scared
Cried
Wanted to die
Had no one to be there
Wanted to stab someone and bash their brains in
Wanted to d i s s a p e a r into t h i n  a i r
Even though they remind me of some of the awful memories,
Being reminded of these memories and the lessons I have learned only makes me
s t r o n g e r
Whatever cruel entity, god, goddess, deity of any kind, gave me this cruel life thank you
You have made me wise
You make me think about how I am not the only person with these problems and how others have worse
But also *******  y o u for hurting so many innocent people and corrupting their
o n c e  p u r e  m i n d s
I will live with my scars and probably add more but I will always think of the cruel fates of others and how cruel the world truly is.
I will think of how grateful I am to have lived and how grateful I am to have not have gotten worse than what I have.
Thank you, you ******* life for showing me the right path
©LogenMichel copyright 2014
Graff1980 Aug 2015
I watched her skin
Go from black and white
Then
Start filling out
With color again
Slowly saw the warmth
That had once withdrawn
Come creeping back in
And the pursed lips
Pointed with sorrows kiss
Turned inside out and up again
Refreshed like my favorite web page
Reanimated
Alive instead of stagnant
And black hair turned to brown
Her grey eyes turned to hazel explosions
And the walls came crumbling down
Without knowing
What the showing of such warmth did
I saw my skin start filling in to
I was not smiling
But there was life anew
Brewing and burning through
The dark illusions I was struggling with
I never got a chance to thank her for it
So this is it
A poem of gratitude
Suddenly you happen across my way
Suddenly Love comes in my heart to stay
Suddenly my Life bares new meaning
Suddenly I'm saved by planned reason
Suddenly I enter unto a new season

Deep you crept into my soul
Deep I find I'm turnin whole
Deep the feeling of purpose come
Deep my grattitude run
Deep my soul welcome the Sun

But

Suddenly I face goodbye
Deep inside my heart slowly die
Suddenly you leave to go
Deep inside I noW must know
Suddenly I'm again alone

Suddenly....Deep.
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Heaving chest
Blood leaking from heaveans mouth
Scared shacky hands
A forienger to this strange land
Of shadowy plains
And rip shattering pain
Eyes so brave
No tears in the blue pools
Strong soul
Ready to escape
The cage your body holds about it
Whisper in the nights wind
Just be silent my love
Hold on to me
You'll be okay
And the bombs blast in the backround
Of his cries
As she, his love dies
With a note that she had carried through the
War feilds
My love ,
Hold your tears for another day
I am brave
I will not be scared when my
Light
Shines in my eyes
And my reaper takes me from this
Land
Of breathing
I will not be afraid to
Face what lies before me
I am strong my love
Be strong to
Fight for our will
Fight for me to
Always hold my love with you
As a token of grattitude
For all that you have done
And will do
And in my last breath.....
I love you
betterdays Mar 2014
we are,
but the little pebbles
nestled
in the sand of time's
slow flowing river.

it is merely,
the disparate nature
of our minute size
in opposition
to the immensity
of the ponderous
river's drift,
that creates
the grind of pebble,
one to another.

causing,
the eroding
of our
singular thoughts.
it is only
the gentle tap-clacking
of another's desire
to know,
and be known.

that causes,
the acceptence
of the rasp and rub
of external catechisms.

causing,
rejuvenation
in the questing
of kindred souls.

that causes
the revelation
of differing paradigmal,
sways and drifts,
some sympathetic,
some callously
indifferent.

causing,
an ebb and flow
of treatise
and dissertation.
as we abraid
and hone
each other's
sensory disposition,
begetting,
spectrumunul emotions
from elanic bliss
to yearning,
dolorous sorrow.

that causes,
introspective despair
that grapples
against difinitive delight.

we the pebbles,
caught within
this mental current,
cannot visualise
the infinitesimal alterations wrought by time.

yet,
others remark
upon the changes,
that is the way
of the waters path,
as time flows,
unrepentant
into the basin
of life's sea.
we must to survive,
simply concede
our pretentions
and comply
to the  power inherit
in the water's
flow
I wish to give tjis poem, agian....it is one of mybearlier pieces. ...and  was written during a time in which  ded poet , wrote and encouraged  my writing.....I  feel it is a fitting memorial ...to him as a person who struggled with aspects of his life....yet gave of himself in a beautiful and passionate  way ... He will be missed.....vale my friend....
betterdays  Oct 2014
lightbulb
betterdays Oct 2014
perched,
on a tendril whisp,
of a synaptic vine.
the half formed
thought,
chirped and chirked,
as it chipped away
at the ovipidal embrace of  
sleepy, slothfulness....
sublime.

it wanted freedom,
to fly and sing....
no longer,
sleeping or,
being held within...
no longer,
hiding away
from the sun.
no longer,
fearful of becoming...
undone.
influencing,
nada and no-one.

just happy to be,
a small, but clear...
clarion call.

now, standing strong
singing out it's
life embracing, life renewing
song.....
this thought, now has,
substance ....
bright coloured wings
and pride....
in the joy, it brings.
it has grace and grattitude.
a name so wonderful....
to go with,
this bright and energetic
attitude...

meet my new, paridigm...
all bursting with love.

his name..... brio

and he is the bringer
of my new zest, zing
and vivacity......
Have you ever thought about what your Life could have been?
The Dream that didnt become real?
The Happiness you might have seen
When alive you could  feel?
To feel blessed upon your quest
To Live the Life you always guessed
Would be your Life-yes it be best
Have you ever yet?

Have you ever stopped to think
How your Life should have been?
How joyfully you"d be tickled pink
When your dream could be seen?
To have what you,you thought u need
To live Life Happily indeed
Would all your heartaches dissapear?
Have you recently?

Well dear reader
I cannot give
You hope that it could be
But what i give
Is simply put:the words that follow be:
"If what you thought about ur Life
Was ment to be seen
Remember then someone or thing
Would never have had been-
And say you were plain Happily
Living out YOUR dream
Then all the Plans God made for you
Would they still have been?
Its not about setteling
For something now you see
But rather embracing Gods Favor
Over who you were ment to be-
And it is only with grattitude
You can accept His grace
For if you knew what could have been
You"d be in a total different place-
It isnt with a happy heart
I say these words to you
For yes within my broken heart
I feel the way you do-
For Life will never be the way
You nor I could dream
But even if we could have been
This Poem would almost not be seen
By you who reads it
And by me
----      ----
Little things die peacefully
Great things rage and fight
Little things will bring you joy
Great things tears and spite
Little things means graTtitude
Great things just delight
Its little things that keeps your Life
And leads you to HIS Light...
Never argue anymore
Just know somewhere"s an open door
Never loose your Heart and Soul
For thats what keeps you whole
---       ---
For Life will never be the way
You nor I could dream
But even if we could have been
This Poem would almost not be seen
By you who reads it
And by me...
Had i been an actor which is my dream-i never would have written these words seen.Everything has a reason.Now i believe
David Sjolander  Oct 2010
Heaven
David Sjolander Oct 2010
The day dawns...
Leaves blanket the lawns...
Fresh coffee emits it fragrant scent...
One wonders where the nighttime went...

A white gauze covers the sky...
A reminder that winter is neigh...
Whatever the cause...
It brings to me pause...

My love will soon alight...
Displaying her broad smile, so bright...
I am moved by her boundless love...
As though she had come directly from above...

When she enters in...
I know that her joy is geniune...
Her docile air...
Her lovely hair...
Her bright glee...
At meeting me...

These are all warming to my heart...
As the new day we start...
Her sincere grattitude...
Improves my attitude...
Toward the world...

I am in Heaven.
Copyright David Sjolander 2010
eb  Nov 2015
bubble
eb Nov 2015
how beautiful
it is to be alone,
on my own,
for i am
complete, wonderful
and without a need
to be loved
by anyone else
because this Light
remains real
especially without you
and your attention;
this is not bitterness,
old friend, it is grattitude
for leaving
and letting go
has been more than
I would have ever planned,
so, let the winds blow you
away, away, away
and the rains
drop, drop, drop
that will lead you
far from me
from us
from those you left
left behind
Remember, you more than enough. Your bubble is all you need.
"Another wave breaks on shore
         I remain still in silent awe
   And as it"s welcomed to the land
           It breaks upon my hand

     A promise I keep leave me now
       And as one wave begins to die
         Another one comes to life

       They take dreams to only ebb
                      I still gaze
                   As I still wept

     A whisper carried on its brake

     And hope remains a little while

           Another wave on shore

         Dreams will be- mine before
         AnOther wave on shoRe..."

This is extracts from my vEry first poem,i posted nearly three years ago on Hello Poetry.How far the journey in but a blink of an eye.
I never would have believed that id be accepted here for so long...It is out of humbleness that i say:This has been a Season in my Life of great grattitude,and feeling as if i mattered...to someone who read my poems-to everyone...to no one...
It has been days of joy-of sadness and of hope-of Faith lost and barely just to cope.
I never thought the time would come...i guess,i hoped it never would.
Give credit where its due:Its all of you whom blessed me in this season,a time in my life i never expected to have ever since Jan 14 2013...when all i set out to achieve was to post a few words from my Soul-and maybe get two or three people to read them...
Today my poems have been seen 40.1k times.a blessing you say?MOST DEFINATELY...
I wish i could meet all of you face to face-to say:Thank you for allowing me to feel noticed,to feel acceptted,to feel like my Soul was welcomed-...on a poetry haven...so different from the Real World.
You have healed my broken wings-you were the reason i carried on.
And now?
Well...what words can i leave now?
Its...been magic
Its...feeling welcomed unconditionally
Its...been healing for me
Its...been an honour to write on Hello Poetry
Its...a season,that Lasted forever in my Heart and Soul-where Time cant ever fade the words....
Its...
Its...
An End
God Bless You ALL-for blessing me
                   Thank You
                          X
            ------FredErick-----
In the mean time
while it's raining in my head
I will blanket the only stars that lit in your sleep at night
beacause in my nights were restless in all my troubled worries of your burning sun
In the mean time
I will hide what I could not hold back from you all these times
... love
Where I can bring my worth up to strangrh
turn the pages and scibble about some kind of "grattitude" and other beautiful things that I can find
other than scribbling about heart aches and heart breaks of you
In the mean time
I will keep on going on with a weary head dugg down in the gutter somewhere wishing you can suffer all emotions suffered and transffer them unto you
In the meant time I will do the ******* do's and throw away the do nots so I may be at peace with myself
In the mean time when you search for me again like you normal had done before my gesture will change about you in that time
In the meant time I will hate in order to love again
but not for you
In the mean time men will swander compliment of taste of me while I suffer loyalty of mind, body, thought, and heart of you
In the mean time I will dissapoint God by doing my own will as to drowning in strong drink just to have the strength to finally drop you
In the mean time I will confide in air and space to cry and ache and toss and turn to cure this desease
which is you
In the mean time I will learn to forgive how you laughed at me because "I ain't ****" and for threatning to get another ***** at me.. what?!! just for ******* loving you?
so in the meant time...
in the mean time
I pray that God will help me through this burn
because I am so tired
of loving you.

© S.T. Rebel of Eden
betterdays  Jul 2014
5000 hearts
betterdays Jul 2014
five thousand hearts.
turned, from grey to red.
so to all who made my day.
made my heart, poetic.
beat, a little less grey
some karmic grattitude,
i send your way...
this morning i came to post
and noticed
i had got 5000 hearts.
so just wanted to say thanks

— The End —