Ive become haunted by a Demon
Who’s making me question my mind
At first I thought he was an Angel
Cuz at first he seemed so kind

He helped me to unwind
And offered me support
When I was able to breathe him in
I felt like I was finally docked at port

I found his presence intoxicating
I always wanted him around
The insight he brought to my life
Was really quite profound

But those good feelings didn’t last forever
And I decided to take some time away
But he refused to leave my side
And I began to feel like prey

I can’t ever seem to escape from him
Hes mastered manipulation and seduction
My inability to walk away
Will be the cause of my destruction

I look into the mirror each day
And am frightened by what I see
Dark circles and red eyes
Is that the demon or is that me?

Every time I think I’ve escaped
He pulls me right back in
“You can’t survive without me
You just have to let me in.”

His voice echos through my head
His thoughts replace my own
….I love  him...I need him...I crave him  
And I’m afraid to be alone

I fear that I am not strong enough
And I want to let the demon win
Let go of loneliness-- embrace corruption.
I submit to my addiction again

My heart has never felt this way
For anyone but you
I had given up on the idea of love
Until into my life you flew

You came into my life
Like a burning fire storm
Your energy was intoxicating
And your touch was always warm

So easily I fell in love
With your light that burned so bright
But it made it so I was blind to see
That something wasn’t right

Things were not as perfect
As I had let myself believe
But I’d caught a glimpse of a happy future
That I’d sacrifice anything to achieve

I constantly made the choice
Between loosing you or who I am
I let you burn away what made me me
And you still didn’t give a ****

Because you were doing the same
Burning away pieces of who you were
Doing whatever you could to impress
The new person you’d grown to prefer

I thought that you loved me too
But I guess I was naive
Cuz within a year of our last kiss
You’d be packing bags to leave

With your head up in the clouds
You flew off to live your new dream
You had found a new partner in crime
And I was once again a one man team.

Now there’s something I need to confess
I loved you more than you ever knew
But I will not cry for you anymore my love
Because you took my heart with you

So if you see me shed a tear
Its not over the severed ties
‘Cuz now the flames have all burnt out
And the smoke is in my eyes

For all the time I've know you
You've worn a mask upon your face
It appeared beautiful, perfect, and friendly
But now I realize that wasn't the case

For hiding underneath that mask
Was a soldier bent on destruction
Posing as a comrade fighting for good
But following the other side's instruction

You wormed your way into our ranks
And we accepted you as one of our own
But all of us were unaware
Your true intentions had not yet been shown

When an opportunity presented itself
You struck without any hesitation
Our troops started dropping left and right
Without any sign of infiltration

You knew you only had so long though
Before your actions got you caught
So you moved to abolish your final target
A tougher task than you had thought

That night, when you attacked me
You allowed your mask to fall
And as you fled, I caught a glance
Of the real person beneath it all

Well, "What doesn't **** you makes you stronger"
And you make me tougher every day
Which is why no matter what you do
I refuse to let you stand in my way

I learned some valuable lessons
About how you fight this war
And now those same old boring tactics
Won't work here any more

So thank you for the knife
That you embedded in my back
For you just gave me the tool I need
To defend against any future attack.

When fighting with depression
One waits for their mental shift
The magical moment when it is over
And their mood begins to lift

Sometimes along recovery road
You find a mental shift that's fake
It doesn't last for very long though
Sadness sneaks back in just like a snake.

I do not suffer from depression
But I do have my own traumas
I want to stay in bed forever
And never change out of the pajamas

I fight to put them behind me
In whatever way I can
Sometimes I think that I've moved on
But find I'm right back where I began

It's like wandering through a forest
But in the middle of the night
With a map I cannot read
And a tiny broken light

I know there is a way out
But I just can't seem to find it
And sometimes I think I see a light
But then fall into a tar pit

After years in the dark forest
After trudging through so much tar
I thought that I was finally free
And could follow the light of a star

That star was my false shift
For I am still fighting like hell to cope
I am still wandering in a never-ending forest
But I might have a tiny glimmer of hope

How far might you go
To protect those you hold dear
How much could you give up
To keep them in the clear

If their life was put in danger
By someone who wanted a thrill
Rather than sit and watch them die
Would you be willing to ****?

What if it were both of you
Who's lives were on the line
If asked who's life should meet an end
Would you be able to say "mine"

What if they were an angel
Who always put others first
And they sacrificed themselves
To keep the world from getting cursed

Would you respect their wishes
And allow their life to end
Knowing they'd be forever in pain
Would you allow them to ascend

Or to guarantee their happiness
Would you give up your own
Would you rebel against your love
And forever be alone

Causing them to hate you
And giving up your soul
Would you still embrace the darkness
To prevent their noble goal

How far might you go
To protect that which you adore
Would you descend away from good
Would you forever close that door?

Sun ached to rise,
above the jagged horizon.
It lit the shadow,
of stone work,
of your craftsmanship.
It stood high,
strong and everlasting.
A stone giant,
held together with assumption.
Assumption of him,
the prince that you seek.
Recently one has followed,
to the top where you lie.
He said the verse,
a promise, an assumption.
He would mend the holes,
patch the sides.
As time rhythmically passes,
the tower would stand,
strong and eager.
Until your assumption,
is not yet reality.
The one that followed,
sometime ago,
has left with the moon.
As your eye tears,
the tower leans,
crumbles.
The salty liquid,
corrodes your assumption,
that is often set in stone.
I watch from afar,
knowing the outcome.
I tread among the emotion,
overflowing and scattered around.
As your kin, your brother,
I help to pick up the pieces.

i had mercilessly turned myself
As frail as a skeleton
In obsessively trying to justify  
your repeated slips and faults
To myself
Rather than contemplating
To hold you accountable
For them
Shading your lies and fables
Like a greedy politician
Hungers for power
And striving hard to find
The smallest fragment
of truth within them
By using every bit of my
Increasingly deteriorating strength
Making incredibly sure
Like an absolute maniac
That you don't notice
Any visible sign or symptom
Of the eye-watering peace and clarity
That freely bled
From the recesses
Of my mind daily
And obliterating the faint voice
In my head
That sometimes tried
To make me aware
About the naked fact
That i didn't deserve
So much pain
That i was deliberately
yet unknowingly
Inflicting upon myself
For someone like you
Just because
I was terrified
Of another biting fact
Apart from you
No one had made me feel
Worthy of
a half hearted and spiritless love
Ever before

The chair that you rendered
Permanently empty
So suddenly
and unintentionally
Without any prior warning
That would have given me
A moment's worth of time
To prepare my heart and mind
Not to succumb
In the depths of
the excruciating void
Of your aching absence
From my life
Still sits
At the solitary corner
Of our house
Hopelessly wondering
If you really wanted to leave
Without saying
a goodbye