The first step towards learning from your mistake
Is accepting that you've made a mistake
Be bold enough to admit your mistakes
And smart enough to learn from them

I.

Blurry green and brown shapes rush past me
at the speed of light, i spin around and around.
Trees, people and playground equipment blend together
in a whirlwind, i am spinning around so fast
i think i might die.
My small hands grip the edges of the black rubber tire.
i squeeze my eyes shut,
thinking that might make the dizziness stop
but it only makes it worse. Pain enters
my fingertips - my arms are ripping apart.
Still, i hold on. i’m afraid
that if i let go my head will hit the ground and my neck will snap.
i hear my brother’s laughter swirling around my head.
i want to beg him to stop the spinning
but i know that crying and pleading only makes this game last longer.
When i asked him to play this wasn’t what i had in mind.
So i wait quietly.
This will all be over soon.

II.

Darkness is all around me.
The one tiny hole near the lid of the toy box allows
only a sliver of light into my little wooden prison.
i run my fingers along the dark walls
beside me and all around me, feeling
the grains of the unfinished wood.
My finger catches a sliver and it stings
but i don’t cry because
crying only makes this game last longer.
The old toy box groans under the weight of my brother’s body.
i can hear his fingers mashing the Nintendo controller
and his feet kicking against the outside of the box.
When i asked him to play, this wasn’t what i had in mind.
If i wait quietly, he will eventually get bored
and this will all be over soon.

III.

The grass is wet and yucky underneath
my body, cold and slimy.
Rows of houses watch in judgement
against black suburban sky,
their inhabitants fast asleep and safe in their beds
while i lie here with this strange man’s ***** hands around my neck.
How did i get here? A few too many rounds
of *****-fueled drinking games,
each sip burning up a piece of my awareness
until all i can comprehend is his heavy body
on top of me, his cold, unfamiliar eyes.
When i asked him to play, this wasn’t what i had in mind.
Each time my ragdoll head smacks the ground,
the sickening sound bounces between my eardrums.
He could easily ragdoll me to death.
i pray someone will step outside and end this game,
but screaming will only make him panic,
and wild animals can be unpredictable when cornered.
So i wait quietly and hope
this will all be over soon.

As a child, adults said it's a phase we would go through; Some say we do it to keep from being who we are?
There as some things that just can't be decided overnight however most grow into who their suppose to be.
We look the same when we get up in the morning and when we lay down at night or do we ?
Some put on makeup to cover up the face that isn't happy
men sometimes shave a face that isn't ready to grow up (changing faces)
to disguise ourselves, putting on aires to make believe we're who we want to be or think we are.
Shallow in our own minds ashamed at times and confused what is beautiful
beauty is so much more than skin deep
can't hide scares that bruise real deep (shape-shifting faces)
should you go on pretending that these many faces don't bother you?
Vivid in a confused mind (scandalous faces) I see before me, scared
by tormenting words and taunts of no respect of the heart (lying faces)
these images , these many faces are misleading you to believe that you can trust and hold on to it!
It's better to put on your greatest face and perform a self-confident face !

My dear friend was a day
older today
with the rising sun.

We all gathered 'round
to celebrate
and to find some fun.

The presents were grand
we sang him the song
that is always sung

I could see in his smile
that his battle
was finally won.

From the light of the candles
flickered the truth
I saw the years in his eyes

but not the years of age,
there was something more
eons of something wise

free of his past,
freedom at last
no verses were left unsung

I could see in his smile
that his battle
was finally won

Surrender now,
surrender to
what was falsely
taught to you

incessant myths
that once abound
are now to him
but just a sound

I can rest in the knowing,
his future is clear
now that he's found his light

just as sure as the night
follows the day,
and day follows the night

I only hope
he knows that his journey
has just begun

I hear in his laughter
the joyous song
of the enlightened one

and his pain is naught
but the sound
of a distant drum

and I see in his smile
that his battle
is finally won.