I was born on April 5th.
That makes me an Aries.
I don't really know what that means.
I'm 5' 5", I weigh 109 pounds, I don't know how to swim and I'm a sucker for a boy with a nice smile and clean sneakers.
I'm still learning how to whisper.
I'm often loud in places where I should be quiet.
I'm often quiet in places where I should be loud.
I was born feet first and I've been backward ever since.
I like Dr. Pepper.
A lot.
I've been told that I give really bad hugs.
People say it feels like I'm trying to escape.
Sometimes it's because I am.
Secretly I get really nervous every time someone gets close enough to hear me breathe.
I have this odd fascination with things like sand castles and ice sculptures, I assume it's because I usually find dedicating time to things that will only last a few moments.
That's also why I tend to fall in love with boys who will never love me back.
I know it sounds crazy but it's actually much easier than it seems and to be honest, I think its safer that way.
See, relationships, they often remind me that I'm not afraid of heights or falling, but I'm scared of whats going to happen the moment that my body hits the ground.
I'm clumsy.
Yesterday I tripped over my self-esteem, I landed on my pride and it shattered like an iPhone with a broken face.
Now I can't even tell whos trying to give me a compliment.
I've never been in the military but I have this purple heart.
I got it from beating myself up over things I cant fix.
I know this sounds weird but sometimes I wonder what my bedsheets say about me when I'm not around.
I wonder what the curtains would do if they found out about all the things I've done behind their back.
I've got a hamper that's overflowing with really, really loud mistakes and a graveyard in my closet.
I'm afraid that if I let you see my skeletons you'll grind my bones into powder and get high on my fault line.
Hi.
My name is Callie.
I enjoy Arnold Palmers, warmth from the Sun, and laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
But I don't allow myself to cry as often as I need to.
I have solar-power confidence.
I have a battery operated smile.
My hobbies include editing my life story, hiding behind metaphors, and trying to convince my shadow that I'm someone worth following.
I don't know much, but I do know this.
I know heaven is full of music.
I know God listens to my heartbeat on an iPod.
It reminds him that we still got work to do.

Finding a lover is effortless
for some people.
They only want a few things:
Someone attractive, kind,
funny or rich.

But
I desire
something so much deeper.

I want

an intelligent mind
that wakes up thoughts in me
I didn't realize were hibernating.

I want

to converse, analyze and debate
without being conscious of
the sun rising and falling
between our words.

I want

to make a witty remark
at a coffee shop
so he can reply sarcastically
just for me to jab back immediately
and for him to comeback back playfully
until we're both laughing
stomachs shaking
spit flying
the whole store staring
and we leave
without coffee

I want

our hands to stitch together
perfectly
like two lost puzzle pieces;
one found under a couch cushion
one found inside a junk drawer.
The rest of the puzzle has
already been thrown away
but
these two pieces remain
and they fit.

I want

to fall in love together
then together fall in love with
art, museums, songs, poems
T.V shows, radio jingles,
greek food, backroads,
our mutual hatred for pop culture,
doing the dishes (as long as he washes and I dry)
wrong turns, piled up laundry, life.
Just fall in love with life.

I want

to hurt with him

I want

to save the world with him

I want

to meet, see, understand
and experience all that is foreign
with him.

I think it will only take us meeting
and it'll only be history and happiness from then on.

It's just a matter of if a love like that could ever be
and if a love like that could ever be for me.