Long awaited you have been
Please don’t make me spin

last year had enough twists and turns
it’s certainly a time that’s been burned

into my brain and the memories of us all
As I am sure you recall

Please do me a favor
I’ll take you as my savior

do not make this year hell
I just want everything to go well

Be the opposite of last year
Let’s create a new frontier

a better future
where you are not the same abuser

2020 striped me of so much
but 2021 it is you that I trust

We come from different sides of reality
oh, its quite a tragedy

5 foot 2 blonde hair blue eyes
the reality some seem to despise

Hidden behind every corner is a new obstacle one must attack
Constantly I watch my back

women in the world today
constantly watching what we weigh
lack of support
so we try to conform

Become exactly like you want
yet my devils still haunt

You will never know the truth to my reality
oh its quite a tragedy

I look at the mirror but I am unsure of what I see
Of course on the outside she is me

But I look at her eyes
With that a little piece of me seems to die

We are not the same 

I keep my pain tucked inside
But yet it does not hide

I am who I am because of what went on
I am who I am because of how I strived on

She is the past I wish I could forget
The one who is filled with regret 

The one who questions her worth 
Instead of knowing what she deserves 

She is me and I am her
Yet there is quite a few lines that we blur

I live in fear
But never for myself

Bystanders video, as the act done
by “my people” takes place

But I am not one of “my people”

I live in fear
Not from them, but for them

Another mother who loses her son
Maybe from a gun
maybe from a cop kneeling on his neck
Either way it is not correct

Innocent lives lost, with no one to pay

Day after day, the fear grows
Sprouting into the unknown

Pouting people pray
But they could never repay

“my people” keep their jobs
And their lives

I wish things could go my way
For I would jump far forward to what I hope will be the good days

I am ready to go
not too far I hope

I’ve been distant and distracted
it has caused a lot of traction

who I was has faded
I think back on all I traded

I would have done anything for you

but now I am left here without a clue
no idea who I was
no idea of what I’ll become

but I hope that you’ll be happy
I don’t regret all that happened

I was gone long before I met you
our time together was nothing more than a vacation

I must leave again though
until I have something I can show

not for you, but for me
I need to find my missing piece

You are worth more than you know
you have overcome the lowest of all lows

battled with your self
tried developed your wealth

let someone else in
you don’t need to be a lone wolf

you can be the leader of the pack
trust me there is nothing you lack

I never doubted that we were all equal
After all we’re all just people

We need to trust that our generation will correct
The mistakes of those from the past

We cannot fear what tomorrow will bring
For we must focus on today’s things

For centuries we have dealt with this type of brutality
Which is why there are countless casualties

This must end soon
Although we will never heal their wounds

Never question where I stand
I will always be there if you need a hand

I will never judge you by the color of your skin
But rather by what’s within

Look at me when you need support
For I will continue to reinforce

The BLACK LIVES MATTER
Even when we are not all gathered

This quarantine has left us wrecked
Mental illness we can no longer neglect
nearly everyone has become depressed
family bonds have been put to the test

This level of trauma is hard to bare
We were nowhere near prepared

People say this might happen again in the future
Hopefully it’s just a rumor

Only time will tell
Hopefully we can break this spell

I wish we could be sure
Because it is not something I wish to re-endure

Even when this clears
I will still live in fear

With a pantry fully stocked
a secret stash of hand sanitizer locked
Maybe then I won’t be so shocked

People have died
Yet some believe it’s all a big lie

The way this seems to work
I am sure it will lurk

In the back of our minds it will stay
Until it comes back one day