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Monika 20h
Isn’t it wild, how the universe misaligns?
Creating distance through time by drawing lines.
You were here before my first breath began,
I’ll spend my years chasing where you stand.

Oh, if I could rewrite the stars’ decree,
I’d cast myself into your century.
A sister, a confidant, your equal in time—
Not just your child, but a partner in rhyme.

We’d share the rhythm of life’s steady tune,
Matching footsteps beneath the same moon.
Not mother and daughter with years to compare,
But living as equals, the same life to share.

But this isn’t our story; this isn’t our fate—
Time separated us, made me too late.
You live in a past I can only trace,
Through your wisdom and the lines on your face.

I'll learn about you by trying to guess,
Closer in age, maybe then you’d confess,
That you’d borrowed my strength more times than I knew—
And in return, I’d say I learned how to be strong from you.

You age like fine wine, your spirit refined,
Each year adds layers, a shine so divine.
But my heart aches with a bittersweet pain,
Knowing we’ll never age the same.

For every year that makes you glow brighter,
The space between us becomes a bit wider.
And though time keeps pulling us apart,
You’ll always remain timeless in my heart.
Monika 20h
I speak, they listen—wide-eyed, still,
as if I bend the world to will.
Yet all I do is state what’s there,
but truth is rare—so they just stare.
I just speak what sparks my brain,
it isn’t deep, it’s just explained.
The things that sting, the truths I fear,
I lock away where none come near.

...But I am not some guiding star,
Just tired of how lost they are.
And wisdom’s just a hollow throne,
When no one's speaking in your tone.
They crave uniqueness, desperate to glow,
yet fear the depths they’ll never know.
I wear my difference like a scar,
standing alone, for what we are.

I am not profound—just alone,
It's a dialogue I'm longing for.
My entire life, just been searching for equals,
Instead—empty echoes of applause and sequins.
I never asked to lead the way,
'Cause if I had the chance, I'd never stay.
Someone, somewhere, speaks like me,
Without a need for poetry.
Monika 20h
Can you believe it's been five years?
Those few days, I mourn in million ways.
And I fall for you each time as they fly by,
Breaking my heart a little more, each July.

Did you know it all along?
Were my glances loud, or my silence strong?
So careful to never do anything wrong,
Carrying all that's unspoken for so long.

Keep it benign without crossing the line,
Despite my wishes and all that cheap wine.
'Cause it was never supposed to become real,
I was content with keeping in what I feel.

Sometimes, I wish people like you,
Could peer through the eyes I see them through.
You were a midsummer's dream, mighty, divine,
Unreachable, untouchable, and never mine.

I'm not someone who dwells on fantasies,
But I do love to romanticize my tragedies.
And despite all the admiration and yearning,
I liked it when it was but a dream returning.

You turned the lights down, and the room went black,
But you were never supposed to kiss me back.
I never prepared myself to win the game,
I lost the plot when I realized you too felt the flame.

What made this year the one to break?
What changed in you — or was I the mistake?
Was it just timing, or something more?
Something new, or was it there before?

I don't know what to do with all these thoughts,
With the flashbacks and the guilt, and purity lost.
I'll never know why, and that's the curse,
Nor why it matters when I had it so much worse.

All those years — yet I kept myself sane,
Now everything I thought I knew went down the drain.
I feel like the confusion I feel is driving me mad,
And I never even knew you can feel this type of sad.

You were my favorite never-was,
Yet I admired you for following the laws.
Now that I touched what once felt divine,
There's only emptiness, and the "you" I can't define.

You were better as a ghost in my head,
Than the man who left me sleepless in bed.
What I thought I wanted — I left in your hands,
Now I don’t even know where our story stands.

I can’t forget, but I don’t want to keep,
Reliving a truth that won’t let me sleep.
By telling you this, I know I've said goodbye,
But I had to speak before more time went by.
Monika Mar 8
Change has been my lifelong foe —
We've been at war since forever ago.
Been in battle ever since I gave life a chance,
It was the only way for me to take a stance.

Losing control — my worst nightmare
That's a recipe for disaster, right there.
Getting consumed by the fear of the unknown,
Back at square one, no matter how much I've grown.

So every step, I measure twice,
Safe for now, but skating on thin ice.
Always making sure things fall perfectly in line,
Mapping my path, watching out for a sign.

Yet roads will twist — they always do 
No matter how well I plan them through.  
Now a higher power has taken the wheel,
Swerving, getting tortured by the despair I feel.

Unfair how time wields a ruthless hand,
Undoing all the things I have planned.
A single crack and the flood pours in —
Chaos ensues, and mayhem within.

One wrong move, one shift too steep,
And I’ll be falling, falling deep.  
They say that change can set you free —
But freedom feels like losing me.  

I'd rather chain myself in place,
Than gamble all I can’t replace.  
No script survives, no maps stay true,
Control dissolves — as I do too.

Too late for salvation — there's only grief
But perhaps it brings a strange relief. 
For change may call, but I won’t flinch —
You'll have to escape my grip, inch by inch.

And perhaps one day, I'll make my peace
No longer holding on, ready to release.
And maybe I'll even learn something from it,
Like that by losing the game, I've also won it.
Monika Feb 23
Give credit where credit is due,
And time will **** it all for you
... But all in good time —
It's patience at its prime

Stop feeding your internal strife,
You've been killing time all your life
Waiting for the world to shift its tide,
Unaware time was always on your side

I finally get it — better late than never,
Now I'll become the game, not just a player
No longer trying to beat the clock,
Ready for action not just cheap—*** talk

Can't turn it back, so I won't look behind
Mistook it for an enemy for never being kind
Believed if I had more of it I'd surely touch the sky
Never waiting for me, I hated that it could fly

But as it goes by I've got less and less to spare
Instead of it getting easier, we learn not to care
They promised I'd get it once I come of age,
But if time's money, I only have loose change

So Ima take some time off while it heals all my wounds,
Gave me a hard time even when I followed the rules
I wonder if I'm just wasting time until I'm all out of it
Guess only time will tell — poetic a bit

Anyway, I promise it's the last time I'll ask
This time, I'll even take off my mask;
Could you find the time,
To make some time
For me to try
And make it in time
This time?

— The End —