Neo Stargazer

Dec 2015

Brandi R Lowry

Raindrops kiss my skin
As the sky softly weeps

Winds exhale a deep sigh
Earth's breath engulfs me

I soar to great heights again
Seeing all that lies below

The taste of tomorrow's rain
Quenches the thirst of my soul

My wings singe the sky
I'm consumed by the sun

Still caught in the clouds
While the storm rages on

Emotional hues color the horizon
Brushing along the shadows

Life is a beautiful hurricane
Love is a rainbow

Dec 2015

Declan Quinn

Cheer up!

Cheer up, he said.
Give yourself a shake, she said.

Take the pills, he said.
Talk to someone, she said.

Stop asking for attention, they said.
Stop putting your drama on Social media, they said.

Stop trying to tell people, they said.
Nobody cares, they said.

Everyone’s depressed, they said.
Everyone’s suffering, they said.

Hide your illness, I heard.
Hide your shame, I heard.
;

Not sure what to say about this one. People seem to resonate with it though. DJQ

#depression #illness #anxiety #shame #invisible #ill #denial

Dec 2015

Kathryn Paige

An Open Letter to my Anxiety

You are not defined
by the pain in your stomach
or the tightness in your chest,
and your shaky hands
and the inability to breathe
are not signs of weakness,
although you have convinced
yourself differently.

Every masterpiece was once
a work in progress,
and there is more to you than
a disorder.

-k.w//An Open Letter to my Anxiety

Neo Stargazer Dec 2015

The Mechanic

They're the one that everyone sees as the light,
the one who clears out the darkness
their gentle hands masterfully working
between the twisted gears and wires
But so much time does the mechanic spend
polishing gears and rekindling hope
that those blind eyes pass over, glazed with the false belief
that the mechanic's own fire is still burning strong
Each clock they fix, each machine they clean, enigmas within the mind
they give their own light and their flames die slowly
no longer holding hope for themselves
Still, they gather the pieces around them, shattered, broken, bent and twisted
tweaking and twisting till everything's perfect,
because their work keeps the embers alive, barely aglow
amongst the broken parts within them
It is the last hope they have left

Will anyone save the mechanic who fixes everyone else?
The one who couldn't possibly have darkness in other's eyes?

#broken #hope #light #hopelessness

Neo Stargazer Dec 2015

This Is All Just a Bad Dream...

.... a n d y o u 'r e n e v e r w a k i n g u p.

        It's numb, it's cold
                          But at least, I'm still being held; I'm still being wanted
   I can feel his heartbeat, but no love
                                                                                            Just freezing cold lust                                      I shouldn't be here
               But where do I go?
                                                                           If I leave, I'll be alone again
        The crushing weight of solitude, more than I can bear
                                                                  Even if I'm unloved, I'm still wanted
                              And that is all I've ever wanted
               Even if he's cold
             Even if my heart is left with scars, open and bleeding
            Even if I'm surrounded by chains
  I can't leave
      *I won't leave

I made a reference to a game I've played named "Undertale" in the title and first line.
Ah.... explanations.... past relationships?
This one is really rough- I'm not proud of it. It was just something I needed to get out of my buzzing head at the time.

#solitude #neglect #relationship #numb #struggle

Neo Stargazer Dec 2015

"I love you"

How do you know that "I love you" is true?
The soft words on my lips,
never passed towards anyone before
now given to him; but sometimes, he won't respond
and nearly always, I must be the first one to speak them
He returns with silence when he's numb, troubled,
consumed in his own darkness
I understand why- but it still brings me fear
A shiver through my core, static in my head
I don't believe he understands how special he is to me,
or how important my "I love you" means
And I wonder, does he love me?
Does he love me in his darkness, does he love me enough to save me* from mine?
Will all of the times I've worked hard to be his light
*become meaningless?

Ah... so disorganized.
More so a line of thought, one I thought others may identify with.
I fear that I give too much of my heart for those who will never give as much back.

#love #fear #darkness #meaningless