Sometimes
I still think of you.
Most times
You're here in with me.
Head or heart
In both, sometimes apart
..Forever the heart.
I wish I could just say 'hi'
And tell you
That at times I go back,
Reminiscing on you and I.
I need to tell you
That when I said that "I will love you..
Always, no matter what"
That I really meant it,
Standing the test of time.
I wanted to tell you that if you still really feel
Everything I feel..
Then I must to apologize for all the Agony.
The negative emotions,
The way I look but don't see.
And all of the too many thoughts I still have.
The fears & Energy...
I hope they're far from you my dear.
**** I still love you.
**** it hurts so bad.
I fear crashing into you,
For my heart will be totaled.
I can't know
If you're happy or sad,
Both would be equally bad.
I can't see your skin,
The freckles running down your arm.
I wouldn't be able to look
Into your eyes
See your soft thighs,
My insides would just stop working, die.
I fear you having negative
or false thoughts towards me,
Thinking that I moved on.
I'm so afraid that you're still hurting,
Like I'm hurting.
There is no one,
no where to move past you.
I need you to know that
You are still my number one,
Forever.
I changed with you,
You became a piece of my soul
Which I could never erase,
I wouldn't want to.
Please know
I'm still here,
Thinking you're beautiful
Even though I've seen your ugly.
Precious girl,
I wish I could tend to you
When you're down.
I wish I could see you up..
Smiling,
But I really can't.
If you thought differently,
I need you to know,
It was you,
It was me.
How silly,
I still care for you..
More than anyone.
My blood, it's you,
My sight, it's you.
My vision of Love,
It will remain..
You.
Even if you have moved on
I need you to know that
I still am deeply in love with you.
Not rivers deep,
And not oceans deep.
Not even galaxies deep,
Or the universe deep.
It's black hole deep,
Only we know what's in
That black hole.
Nothing can or will ever compare.
Please know.
For the ones I loved but lost.