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  Nov 2018 Megan
Avary
it's another early AM when salt tears splash my face,
they sting, but they are daisies compared to the swords I have endured with you.
it's almost half a year since you took what was not yours to take,
with your mumbled excuses and your dismissive gestures.
i brace myself, the pain looms again, i shout at it to GO AWAY,
the reminder of what you did, but it is a pain that paracetomal will not subside, because the pain is a memory;
the increasing anxiety, the thought of you inside of me when i did not want you to be there.
GO AWAY.
Megan Oct 2018
Snake eyes coloured caramel brown,
a bittersweet combination of liquid gold and sin.
A smile that made me melt,
disguising sinister intentions.
Snakes slither in long grass but this grass only reached my shins
and you still managed to deceive me.
Master manipulator?
Painted a smile on my face with cruel intent.
Leading me to believe pretty little lies
while you slept in my bed every night,
one arm around my frail body, the other with your fingers crossed behind your back.
You never planned to stay -
fooled me.
Now the snake eyes exposed
when I catch you in bed,
legs intwined with hers, bare.
You told me sweet words that morning,
then nine hours later you moved on to her.
This is not fair.
You do not get to create my feelings
and destroy them yourself.
Eyes now pitch black,
no specks of gold or hazel or caramel,
just depths of malevolence -
no remorse for shredding my heart.
Feeding me your "I'm sorry" after "I'm sorry"
but you still play the games.
Do not waste your breath
on words you don't mean.
It's okay, I can play too.
Devil eyes coloured ocean blue;
my combination worse than yours.
Fear me, fear me
for I look innocent and gentle
but a tornado lives inside me that can destroy souls and bring men to their knees.
You fuel my fire.
Now with each breath, smoke escapes my lips from the furnace ignited in my stomach.
Do not run from the dragon you created.
Do not mess with girls like me.
Girls with fire in their guts
and ice in their hearts.
Cunning, sly and out for vengeance.
Feel my fire, succumb to my smoke.
******* revenge.
Megan Oct 2018
Angel.
Angel littered with scars, her halo askew above her head. Worn wings turned black and blue, *****. No longer white and pure; she's seen too much to remain white and pure.
Poor angel girl.
Poor angel girl with trauma igniting her senses. Rain soaked hair, mascara paints her eyes black, smudged crimson lipstick resembling the blood she plans to spill.
Angry angel girl.
Angry angel girl with boiling blood and fingertips of venom. Touching lives and turning them to ash. Falling asleep to the screams of those who hurt her.
Angel turned devil.
Angel turned devil with sunken in eyes, pain hidden behind the blue. White knuckles gripping onto reality, she doesn't want to be alive anymore. Losing control, losing control, losing control.
Devil girl.
Devil girl with no soul, spitting on the lives of those who wronged her. Pulling strings like a puppet master, karma at work. No-one hurts an angel girl and gets away with it.
  Oct 2018 Megan
alias
I'll bury all my secrets in my skin,
come away with innocence
but bleed my truthful sins.
the world around me feels like
a tight cage
and "I love you", is just a camouflage
for your next episode of rage.

If you do love me, let me go
I'll probably run away before I truly know
my heart is too black to care,
is it destroyed if it was never really there?

I'll find my penance, delivered to my true state
if I'm alone I have no one to hate,
but myself.

My love was banished long ago,
if you still care don't ever let me know.

Angels will lie to keep control
making over heaven like some paradise we all want to go
dead trees are painted white
and she calls them beauty, art.

My selfish thoughts colour my life
and I call that my heart.

If I had to fix myself I don't know where I'd start
But I suppose,
I'd cut each limb to the bone
and tear my entire self apart.
inspired partly by ***** by Slipknot. and the insanity that is my life and mind lately.
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