alias Oct 2018
talk to me, I'm torn
I could get lost in a voice like yours
tell if I'm wrong or right
tell me I could stay tonight

it's in the way that you fool everyone
when you're falling in love again
so tell me
how this ends

Cause no one knows you like I do
they don't see you like I do
they'll try to
oh if only they knew
they'll never come close to you.

and you brighten up the world
with your eyes
and you're so **** lo(v)(n)ely
when you're only my mind
cause you're the only one

cause no one knows you like
I do
they don't see you like
I do
they'll try to but if only they knew
they'll never come close to you.

no one will ever be as close to me as you.
alias Oct 2018
I’m just an option for you.
When you’re lonely and blue
When you feel like no one knows you.
But when you feel okay
When she’s making you feel like a sunny day
You just slowly shake me off
And fade away.
I feel it in my bones.
You don’t have to say anything.
I won’t keep making myself look dumb by being one-sidedly persistent.
For all the faults and mistakes I’ve made
At least I’m consistent.
alias Oct 2018
What is life without tragedy?
I heard once, that a man with no sadness has no dignity
I mean it's kinda sexist but you get the gist.

I could spill my entire heart,
cough it up onto the floor.
But don't tell me you don't wanna keep this up a little more?
like true artists we derive our beauty from our pain,
and if I can be your inspiration honey
then at least we didn't do this in vain.
I could say so much but I'll keep my lips shut tight,
I will say this though,
I distinctly think about one night.
It's not sad no, quite the opposite in fact
after everything fell apart, in drunk and loneliness
I went back.
That's all I'll say, I'm pushing buttons because
you're hovering over mine so slightly.
***, I need to learn to be like you
and sew the strings between my lips, tightly.
It's sort of nice like this, artistic impression
of I suppose our most honest thoughts, truthfully.
For you say so little when we do talk,
but boy do you ever write beautifully.
not so sad for once
alias Oct 2018
you'll find someone else and drift away, leaving me in stone cold silence from day to day. Do you ever get tired? Because unlike you, even when I have someone, you run through my mind all day.
did I just use a cheesy pick up line?? hahaha
alias Oct 2018
I'll bury all my secrets in my skin,
come away with innocence
but bleed my truthful sins.
the world around me feels like
a tight cage
and "I love you", is just a camouflage
for your next episode of rage.

If you do love me, let me go
I'll probably run away before I truly know
my heart is too black to care,
is it destroyed if it was never really there?

I'll find my penance, delivered to my true state
if I'm alone I have no one to hate,
but myself.

My love was banished long ago,
if you still care don't ever let me know.

Angels will lie to keep control
making over heaven like some paradise we all want to go
dead trees are painted white
and she calls them beauty, art.

My selfish thoughts colour my life
and I call that my heart.

If I had to fix myself I don't know where I'd start
But I suppose,
I'd cut each limb to the bone
and tear my entire self apart.
inspired partly by ***** by Slipknot. and the insanity that is my life and mind lately.
alias Oct 2018

where did we get ourselves today?
are we making progress, healing ourselves
or still basking in the glow of yesterday?
You're not in love with me anymore, contrary to what you think
I believe you're in love with the girl three years ago
that made your heart soar and sing.
You're in love with what we were,
let's not pretend.
But we're different now
my rings are gone, that girl three years ago is dead.
I'm not so lost, not so broken
not so much leaning on a substance to keep my eyes open.
But that was all you,
you were the glue that fixed me.
You manifested someone new,
and now you're not in love with me.

I'm still her, I guess
just put together, in heels and a pretty dress.

Maybe in time this will all make sense.
Maybe one day we won't be confined
to confusing lines
on an ambiguous url address.

Maybe one day,
we can confess our truths

truth is,
that's all I ever wanted from you.
honesty. transparency.
alias Oct 2018
How cliche
Something happens and she writes a poem about it.
Obviously she would.
She wants to go off on some apology about how she never meant what she said or never meant it in that way but does it really matter anyways?
You already know everything. You know she’s ****** up you know she’s self assured but in the worst ways. She’ll give you everything you’ve always wanted, and then just take it all away. She’s self centred and narcissistic and rude and carries herself so poorly.
You don’t need to worry about her because in the end of the day there’s nothing you can do. She has been given it all by luck. By pure luck. If she ****** it all away it’s her fault, hers and only hers. She’s a dumb little girl who doesn’t know reality. She’s a ****** **** who can’t face her insignificant pretentious anxiety. She’s a ******* ***** who gets overwhelmed and cries. She hurts people without even trying. And gets hurt when she gives. So she deserves to stay up for weeks thinking of how to make it right.
She deserves it
She deserves it. All the hate she’ll ever get.
2 amso yeay
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