It's snowing,
And the blood is pumping and flowing,
How did I get here?
Was it due to anger, or fear?
I just remember a card game,
And a bad hangover,
There's a man preaching and I can't see,
I guess this is perfect for me,
I asked for a shot,
But they gave me a bottle,
I asked to see the mountains,
And they poured the whiskey down my throat,
And cut eye holes,
I can't complain but still called them goats,
Or *******,
It's gotten blurry,
The snow kicks up in a flurry,
Guess we all got that time,
But no one has got a watch,
Life always ends with a knot,
Of things we did and should have not,
The sun breaks as twilight sets in behind the mountains,
As if God himself is pulling up a chair,
And taking a seat,
The ground opens up beneath my feet.
And it all fades to black,
With the sound of a snap.

I am ****** to repel my lovers.
I am ****** to love more than the other.
I love too **** hard. I give too much of myself.
I splatter myself on walls and my excess dribbles though the cracks

and spills over great spaces.
I don’t know what it is to be subtle or gentle.

All this hurt that I’ve known to be a constant truth                        
has made me timid and infantile in nature.
I’m impulsive and thoughtless…and shaken.
I love too **** hard. My hands are covered in grime from the guts of all the beautiful butterflies that I have crushed in my life.
I cannot wash the guilt  from my encrusted fingers.
I’m trembling. I beg, I plea for the butterflies to perch here.
Even though I know I am not a safe place to stay…
Time and time again I can hear my beloved ones crunch in my grasp
I wince with guilt and do it once more.

Yet still I try. Yet I still think I can make myself better.
Who am I to believe such lies?
Who am I to drag someone into this sick, selfish, and perverse mess?
Who am I?
Did I ever have fingers in the first place? Perhaps they were claws.
Maybe I’ve been a malicious spider from the start.

Born from hatred and ****** to give into hunger.
I’ve been fooling these poor creatures that I can be something else.

It is now beyond question what I am.

I am rotten at my core.

Let justice be served for those who have been burned.
I am rotting.

Let the insects take me over.

Let them exact their revenge on my corpse.

I had it coming all along.

I sat down with you
In the coolness of the night air
Watching you sip Dr. Pepper
After a long day's work
I listened to the sounds of summer
Watched a few stars twinkling
In the jet colored sky
We were happily chit-chatting
About this and that
We were all together
Just us three
Oh, those summer evenings
Gone forever
Only shadows remain
Touching my heart

**~Marian~

I really wonder everytime
How they feel
When they crush every norm’s entities
Is this part of a ritual you religiously do?
Do you smirk or grin everytime you did?
Do you feel better perceiving lives too see them ache?
You do don’t you?

Why?
Because you've been there
You felt that pain, that agony that preludes
That melancholy past precedes you everytime
"Why always me?"
Why do you end up in bruises and blood-
Dripping from beginning to the end?
End?
No!
There’s no end to this
Unless you make it stop

But why relay the pain on others?
You created that villain in your head
You've become what you hate
Do you like that?
Making others suffer for what ‘they' did

You were once good
You still are
Well your pretense won an Oscar for the 'Ignorant'(s)
They know what you did
You broke their wings and the mettle they believed in
They don’t want to lose a 'Friend' like you
Their courage demised never to prevail again
You became this (****)tator
Which everyone obliged cowardly

But be reminded
Like every TV Show
The Hero always wins
Karma will be chasing you
Waiting for the right moment to expose you
You will get the retribution you deserved

You will cry
Remorse will elevate in your senses
And Every Name, Every Face, Every Sound
*Will be remembered to those you maimed.