What if the right one came and I still can't feel a thing?

[31 October]

I've always had this guy of my dream—the guy I wish I had, and the guy I wish I'd have. And you, you are like a dream came true when you walked in. You are everything I have and could ever ask for. You make me want to love when I don't even want to look at someone twice. Maybe me have met before—maybe before this year, or before this life. Maybe my heart has always fallen for you before. Maybe that's why you're everything I could ever wish for.

I don't know if we're going to end up with each other, but I wish we will—cause my dear, you're the one I want to live my dreams with.

And if we don't, that's okay. I'll still wish for you in another life.

—l.m

"I felt so sad, I suffocate."*
— l.m

I bought a white rose today. Not for anyone, not even for anything. It's for me. I buy myself flowers; they make me happy. And I'll do whatever it takes to make myself happy.

All my life, I've been sacrificing everything—even myself—for people who couldn't even appreciate it.

And I think, I think now is time to love myself.

sadness, madness:

to have your heart broken
and
to write about it
like it's the most beautiful thing
you've ever felt
and experienced
and
like it's the most beautiful thing
to feel

when it actually kills you.

— l. m