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Too much on one plate

For a four course dinner date with death

Its getting late and I still can't digest her inevitability
You see,
i am not a singer.
I am a sinner.
I have no future
like a lady,
and my past is dodgy and shady,
at best.
Yet, you can rest.
Even though I am a liar,
i am not a murderer,
nor a thief.
Yes you will never know
where you stand with me,
but i could tell you.
But you never wanted that,
did you?
You hoped for a weekend with the slutty girl,
a week at most.
You never wanted to hold me at my worst,
only to admire me at my best.
Well, i pity you,
I pity you because you could not see the beauty
that my chaos is.
I think.



Yes,



I'm sure this is it.



The final sign.



The last move.



I.

My Love,

I was sure You were the one.
You gave me such hope,
such contentment.
If You could understand,
the way I feel about You.
Well im not sure.
But now?
This is an all time low.
I have never felt this worthless.
What is the value of my life?
Nothing.
At least to You.
And what about me?
Who do I care for?
Where is my loved one?
Why does no one ask?
Oh right.
Sometimes I forget how alone
I actually am.
And sometimes I don't even think
You notice,
or care.
This isn't something You could
possibly hope to understand.
You've always had someone.
You've always been loved.
Even if it wasn't me.
After all this,
I truly believe I am to blame.
I set You on this path of
destruction,
this craving for something more,
starting with our own failed bond.

My Love,
I am unworthy of apologizing.
The damage that has been done...

But i'm sorry,
I'm sorry for ruining this.
I'm sorry for saying hi to You
I'm sorry for saying forever
I'm sorry for everything.


II.


Why can't You see you're all I desire?
Don't You want true love?
Don't You crave a companion,
who longs to spend
every waking moment with You?
I do not understand.
So I will continue this journey of
uncertainty.
This path through hell.
And I walk alone.
It is clear to me.
I was destined to be alone.
Without Her.

what's the point..
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
Louis Brown
I've got a line of ex's
Saskatchewan to Texas
And I left a good impression
Every time
Cause when you keep
An open channel
Life ain't too hard
To handle
And you keep
A little loving
On the line
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
Louis Brown
The winds of change are rising
A dream is falling through
The winds of fate are blowing strong
You're wanting someone new

The winds of change are painful truths
I know I've lost my place
Don't have to read your mind to know
It's written on your face

          STILL I KNOW I CAN NEVER CHANGE
          SO I'LL JUST HAVE TO PRAY...
          THE FICKLE WIND WILL RISE AGAIN
          AND BRING YOU BACK SOMEDAY

It's funny how you wanted me
Before I loved you so
Now that I can't hold it back
I feel that cold wind blow

           CHORUS
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
Louis Brown
There was a frog down in the swamp
Who'd leap a half a mile
I chased that sunday entrée
With all my skill and guile

But when I speared that monster bull
I had a weird hunch
Those bulging eyes were warning me
I sure would hate my lunch

It ain't always a gourmet cook
Who serves the very best
I fried those twitching muscles there
And ate each bite with zest

But a funny feeling took-a-holt
That made me want to jump
Soon I felt me start to crave
A cool place for my ****

I found myself a boggy bank
And did a healthy croak
I bent my legs and leaped a block
And thought my *%$#@X!!# back was broke

I learned my lesson messing with
That cussed hoodoo frog
I sit safe on my pillow now
And don't go near the bog

But I'm still haunted by the hex
That ****** old frog applied
And I'm still getting Blue Cross
For a tender underside
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
N Paul
She loves the feel of good words
And I am full of them tonight.
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
N Paul
Tinkling giggle, rising flush,
Two hearts to burst with tenderness.
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
N Paul
Her glancing blows held savage looks,
Sparkling with mischievous intent.
 Jul 2015 Lilly frost
N Paul
Introduction
There they stood; keeping silent company.
Yet of His face, wept searing electricity.

To the lovers of life*
Here they stand, keeping silent company.
No utterance dealt; yet clear in both their minds
A single, brilliant truth:

He longs for her with a savage delight.
And it cries from every fibre, exalting!
It is in the bearing of his eye;
Rifling through her tender flesh
In search of what he knows, from voices ages old, is there:
That her heart will beat for no other as it beats for him right now;
That in this moment, their Souls are bared
To each other’s glares- naked, and blemished, and cowering-
Yet his eyes remain fixed and sure:

And for this, she loves him.

For they have seen each other for the First of Times,
Truly! And as with many the Ancient Laws unfurled,
They stand aware, in lack of ever being taught,
Aware with every atom, every straining tendon tight
That their time's so very short.

And so they drink… wordless
To each other, to their youth, and to their bodies
Shining like never before in the noonday air
Garbed in cloth that snaps and furls around their waists.

They imbibe with electric eyes,
Eyes that are new born to this world of light
And come out screaming, living, and sensitive
For lack of ever being touched.
They revel in their new-found joy;
Pouring from Her figure,
Of Her sleek, supple waist and the arch of her back,
Bristling with delight,
Of His strong hands and easy smile,
That spoke of laughter scattered
Across countless campfires of summers past.

Their light does burn intense as any fire,
And when their brimming anticipation
Overspills its crimson chalice
The silence shall SHATTER.
To find peace again in each other's arms.
Fumbling in sweet darkness-

Of heavy lids, of earthy flesh,
With lips embraced...

In ravenous finality.
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