Anxiety is
Car motors noise
As loud as a horns
With signs
Of flashing lights
With big sights trampled
Into a small space
With crowds of people
And new faces
You try to find your way out
But you cant
There is no end
Help me out of this.

My periods turn to semicolons
My suicide notes to poetry
My goodbyes became hellos
The blades turn to sunflowers
And the bullets, a rose
My heart still is broken
But the pieces have been found
Death isn’t for me anymore
What is, in the here and now
I still don’t feel enough
But I am alive
And that’s enough to say
Today is not the day I die.

We are the ones who are hard to understand
We'll be the last ones in the movie theatre
because the ending scene made us cry
We'll stop to smell the roses
because they deserve to be appreciated
We are the ones who will take the time
to learn what keeps you up at night
We are the ones who will imagine
an entire future of adventures
with the people who show us love

We are the ones who will love you more
than we love ourselves
We will give you our strongest parts
in hopes that we can make things better
We desire to see you become the best you
to make sure that you always feel our love
We crave affection and appreciation
We give a piece of ourselves away every day
sometimes to people who don't deserve it
Our love is easy to take advantage of
and sometimes we don't get back
the love that we give away

When we hurt, we crumble and fall apart
We constantly have to put ourselves back together
We are more fragile than we like to give off
We carry our emotions on our sleeves
Our flaws have the ability to consume us
We aren't afraid to give you the world
but we are afraid to feel unloved
We want you to see what we see
We want you to understand where we're coming from

We are good people with good intentions
We are stronger than we believe
Not everyone can feel the way we feel
We feel too much, too often
We are not hard to love
We are something not everyone knows how to love
But you need to remember that
your worth does not change just because
no one is there to appreciate you, to remind you

You are not any less lovable
You are the most lovable person in the world
You are a light that the world needs
Your kindness is not your weakness
You do not need to change for anyone's acceptance
You do not need to stop giving love
just because you don't get any back
Your heart is the best thing about you

And one day when you least expect it
someone will notice you from across the room
and know exactly how to love you
They will think all of these things are beautiful
They will deserve the love you can give
They will fill the empty space in your heart
But for now, don't stop feeling
We are the ones who feel everything so deeply
We are the ones who can't give up because
We are the ones who will teach the world
how to love

(read forward, then backward, line by line)

I ran.
Not knowing what else to do
There was so much blood on my hands
It was mine
The kitchen knife
Caught in my chest
Guilt
Consumed by
Fear
I was heightened by
Adrenaline
But running on
Wasn’t enough
While trying to stay calm,
Losing control
It was me that would end up
Dead. Because
He was
In front of me
The whole time
It was too late
Trapped
I found myself
Locked in chains
My fate was
Death.

label? 5.27.25 (5:32 pm / 18:32)
maybe i’m panromantic asexual

maybe if you knew 5.27.25 (5:09 pm / 18:09)
maybe if you knew that i suffered
you wouldn't ignore me like you do
or maybe you would
how would i know?

maybe if you knew that i have been in pain
for every day
for years
since a few months after my eleventh birthday
you would understand

no matter, you say
it'll be alright,
you say
because the only pain you know
is a headache or cramps

not the kind that feels like it's ripping you apart
not the kind that feels like you are on fire
not the kind that feels like your bones rubbing against each other
not the kind that sounds like a creaky door
not the kind that tastes like bitter pills
every morning
and every night
and every day

all the time

fat isn’t a ***** word 5.27.25 (5:03 pm / 17:03)
fat isn’t a ***** word,
you just taught us that it is

you say you’re a little overweight
when we visit you at the doctors

then you show us movies
and all the pretty girls have got 19 inch waists

then we scroll on the internet,
full of diet culture and skinny models

then you put us in front of mirrors
and expect us to not be sick at what we see

adults, you can do better