"Is there anything you're thankful for?"
*"Gradual transitions."

My heart recognized you
the first moment I saw you
I didn't have a chance to get
  your name
Or even say anything at all
  to you...
And as the rest of that night
  passed
As I drove towards home
I never thought I would get
  a chance to see you again
But my heart knew
It knew right away
That it loved you
And that for the rest of my life
  I would love you too
Completely, impossibly, and madly
Together
Apart
This life
The next
For all time
Forward
Or back
I would always love you
And that I always have
In that one first moment
My heart knew

Life is heavy
It sits behind my eyes
On my shoulders
In my chest
Sometimes the weight of it
Gets to be too much
And I find myself gasping for breath
But then I go home
Or as close to one as I have
And he smiles at me
Over a smoking bowl
Tells me stories that he didn't know he had
Curls up around me
Listens to me breathe
And in the dark and the silence
Ear pressed against his chest
His heartbeat steady
I can rest
And everything feels that much lighter

I woke this morning with you on my mind, truth is its déjà vu every time,
me imagining grasping your soft  thighs as my insatiable appetite pleads for your subtle lips and beautiful Brown eyes, an alluring vision, passionate bliss consuming every fragment of my mind.

Help!
In desperate need of hope.

Never fall for a damaged person because they'll lure you in. They'll captivate you with their mysterious past.
They'll tell you that they're broken beyond repair and then you'll make every possible effort to prove them wrong.
They'll scream, they'll yell, they'll howl, they'll yelp. . but somehow you'll become the cure for their pain.
You'll fix them up and believe that it's a permanent change. But their demons cannot be suppressed for long.
Their aura will always allure you and you'll end up being the victim.
Intentionally or unintentionally you'll fall in love with someone who feels nothing but numb.
And this vicious cycle will continue.. because now you'll become the broken person and someone else will fall in love with you.

I cannot express the extent of my sorrow
Knowing you will remain trapped

I am not obligated to approve of everything someone else does
I am not obligated to always be nice, especially when I am not treated nicely
I am not obligated to be agree with people constantly
I am not obligated to laugh at someone's jokes
I am not obligated to look at someone
I am not obligated to act kind at the price of acting with love
I am not obligated to apologize for my feelings when someone else upsets me
I am not obligated to blame myself when I am acting according to my conscience
I am not obligated to always be the one who apologizes
I am not obligated to remain in a toxic relationship
I should be loving
I should look people in the eyes
I should not be petty
I should stand up for what is right
I should express truth and justice at every opportunity
I should respect myself enough to let go of people that put no effort into our relationship
I should respect other people enough to still be friendly even after letting them go
I should respect my own feelings enough to be vocal about them
I should respect other people's feelings enough to be vocal to them
I should be discern unhealthy and negative things for myself and make the choice to change them
I should acknowledge that I can be wrong and I am often wrong
I should also acknowledge that I am not always wrong.