sometimes I think I wanna fall in love
but then I remember
how cold the bathroom floor
felt on my face
and how badly I wanted to rip
the heart from my chest
and how your arms are still my home
despite how many girls you have invited in
even when it was my only residence

drunken dreams amaze me
I dreamt I was drowning
swallowing enough water
to sink a ship
but woke up dehydrated
I dreamt I fell asleep next to you
your hand softly on my hip
but woke up
**missing you more than I have in months

and if you're tired of the blocked calls with no answer, please know it's more than some punk kid with too much time on his hands. Please pick up. I need to hear your voice.
"Hello?"
yes. he's there. he's real. it wasn't all in my head.
"Hello...?"
oh right, that's what your voice sounds like. i'd give anything to have all those late night i love yous preserved in my memory
"Is anyone there?"
it's me. i'm here. i miss you. oh my god i love you. please don't go
please love me
please come back
*please.

In the past 4 months I've built myself a life where I could survive in a world without you. On technicality you get to say I left you. Did you ever once think about what could've been, had you just fought for me? Instead you went straight to bed with as many girls as you could.
No, I shouldn't hold that against you. We were done. We were over. But ******* it you can't beg for me back now!?
I kiss you and I wonder how many girls have been here since the last time I was.
You hold me and tell me you love me and I can't help but accuse you of saying that to everyone else.
"I need you." Well ****, where were you when I needed you!?

it's Thanksgiving
and the only thing I'm thankful for
is the alcohol in my blood stream
suppressing my thoughts
and silencing my screams

it's Thanksgiving
and I wish I could be thankful
you're gone
but I'd really only ever be thankful
if you had never entered my life at all

he never loved you
& he never will

and who's to say anyone ever will
really love you, I mean
because everyone pretends this dark part of you
doesn't exist
but to you
it's the only part left

the stars
tangled and too many
yet not enough
like our words
or our thoughts
or our touches
sparked by the heat
from within
illuminating the night sky
our words, thoughts, touches
so significant singular
but together
create delicacy, beauty, harmony
our love
a blanket of darkness
covered in incredible light
of our words, thoughts, touches
our love
is the night sky