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Julia Aug 2015
people romanticize self-harm
as if it's nothing special
and really, no one is alarmed
everyone's stopped being careful

it's not just about the blood
it really eats your heart out
the suffering makes your head flood
and everything seems so loud

you can't just seek pitiful attention
saying "oh, look, i'm depressed"
you really do deserve a lecture
because the real deal would say so much less

cutting ruins your body
it also pierces your soul
you seek a friend or just anybody
but you always end up alone

the cup of coffee in the morning
is the only thing keeping you alive
the rest of the time you're crying
trying to get thoughts out of your mind

you've got a stash of blades
hiding under your bed
today your sister got engaged
and you might end up dead

you try to down twenty pills
with a chug of burning *****
maybe then you'd see flowery hills
but it's just likely to cause you trauma

you stare at your own blank wall
trying to find a slimmer of hope
and nobody's there to watch you fall
as you exit this life with some dope
having dealt with self-harm problems myself, i understand and empathize the current confusion and a somewhat "hype" poor teenagers have. some may disagree, but it's really just my perspective.
Julia Oct 2014
I believe
That writers are
So brave
Because each time
They start writing
Blotting ink onto
Their paper
Frustratingly typing on
Their laptop
They rip their heart out
Of their chest
And show the world
What it's made of.
Julia Sep 2014
Pain. It hurts so bad
Shattering you inside.

Pain. Your beating heart
Is no longer alive.

Pain. Your weary eyes
Are blinded with dark lights.

Pain. The suffering
And guilt of your life.

Pain. Your teardrops
Stain your blotchy face.

Pain. Your veins throb
Expelling adrenaline as you fade.

Pain. Your mind goes blank
You don't have the attention you crave.

Pain. Your lips are cracked
After crying for hours straight.

Pain. You're shivering with cold
And no one will keep you safe.

Pain. Peer over the edge
Estimating the fall.

Pain. It's all you have
Once you fall in love.
Julia Jun 2014
I don't feel the way
Most girls do

I'm usually sad
I always feel bad

I am not the way
Most girls are

I'm not thin and beautiful
Nor curvy and cute

I was never loved
Like most girls were

Just words and lies
And my burning eyes
Julia Jun 2014
Walls close in
Watching.
Thoughts devour
Hyperventilating.

No way out
Keep breathing.
No explanation
Crying.

Blackness engulfs
Shaking.
Gasping for air
Trying.
This poem was written to try and explain how I feel during an anxiety or panic attack.

— The End —