there is no way i could have predicted
how life taking me away from you would leave me afflicted
i lie here in my bed and press my form against a "body" pillow - a cruel facsimile
because in truth i would give anything to have my cheek pressed to your chest
resting
blissfully

it gives new gravity to those words we know so well
"and i can't make it on my own
because my heart is in ohio"
because i have left europe behind but i seem to be missing a piece of myself
and i feel its absence like shrapnel

my dearest friend, what can i do?
because i am stuck here, and i am without you
so i rewatch our shows and listen to our songs and read your poetry
but it's still a hollow feeling, as though settling for a forgery
because finding a soul like yours, one who knows me so well, so effortlessly
is comparable to finding a fallen star earthbound
and you wield your empathy and intuition so guilelessly
that letting you in and letting you know me was easy and honestly left me spellbound
because even when i tried to shut you out, you persisted
no matter how stubbornly i resisted
you were gentle and steadfast
and i came to rely on that

so here without you, i am bereft
emotionally destroyed at this theft
of my platonic soul mate from my side
but i will persist holding on to this:
the knowledge that come hell, high water, or the zombie apocalypse
i will see you again

Materialistic
   Tangible
      Expensive
        Touchable
           Physical
             Monetary
                Solid
              Things...

Why give that type of gift
When a

  Hug
     Smile
         Kiss
            Laughter
               Happiness
                   And
                         Love
            Are Better and Free...

My vision is clear,
There is nobody standing beside me.
I am all by myself, seeing a reflection with no vanity.
I accept the past,
I accept the future.
I accept the present,
My wounds are sutured.
I am forgiving of my sins - the jealousy that came from within,
I am no longer comparing myself with somebody who is of a structure more thin.
My frame is mature, handles of love and all - My curves are a WEAPON, I am standing TALL.
My body holds no angry bounds,
I am ready to conquer life with precision.
I am STRONG. These are MY decisions.
I am free! I am vibrant! I am fun!
I will not take this progress for granted - I will not run.
I do not need another figure to dictate the lifestyle I lead, I am the only person I need to need.
I am a strong woman - having more than a childlike mind,
Respect and love for myself was granted and earned, by effort of magnitude that cannot be defined.

Revel in the night, the smoke and liquid
The sound waves washing over your limber electric body
The wild lights spinning, tilting, bursting in and out of musky darkness
Trickling with sweat and industrial poison,
                    Dripping with loneliness and longing
         Inhale the voices, howls and whispers brushing against   your      earlobes
Tingling your spine, swaying your future of marble, concrete      and rebar
                            The night is organic. It grows in you.
                      Its fragrance blooms. You can taste its
Sweet vapid fingers on your tongue.  
              Its rhythm surging in your chest.
 Swelling. Your blood cells rush it to the most desolate lighthouse
      Of your soul. Even that last one, out beyond the craggy shores
  Its light orbiting an ethereal void shrouded in icy fog
       Let this floating torch warm even those derelict  spiraling steps
                Let it illuminate forgotten chambers cobwebbed and dank
                Your life can wait. Your envelopes impregnated with bills
                                  Your appointments, treadmill and alarms itch
                    Death will curate you through your museum of horrors
                    Your monochromatic 50 year yawn can resume at dawn
                                                      But not tonight. Tonight
                               Revel in the music, laughter, curves, leather, lips!
        Abstracted desires - embodied, enraptured, erupting
                                      Reincarnate like a drunken god
                           Dancing on a graveyard of dreams

My family enriches me.
I know when I look back I'll see them. When I was pedaling a bicycle by myself for the 1st time they were the ones who got the wheels turning.
When I leave for college, I know they paid the extravagant costs that I couldn't ever thank them enough for, for saving up money that could have been used on a car or new clothes, but they're throwing it all in because they believe in me more more than anyone else does. They will be the ones who wish me luck, they'll hold on to me until I complain and escape their bear hugs that I'll miss before the end of my first day.
When I'm driving away from my wedding I can look through the back window and see them waving.
They teach me how go fill in the lows points and cushion the bumps in life.
Anthony Brandt once said "Other things may change us, but we start and end with family." and while I haven't even lived to 18 as I watch people walk in and out of my life as if the door in my face won't hurt, I look around & find myself surrounded by effervescent love.
My family gives me the courage and determination to take off for myself no matter how scary it might seem, I am constantly becoming a better person thanks to them.

Do you have any idea

how you make me feel
how you make my soul feel
like it is finally home
after a long tiresome journey

a journey in which day felt like night
a journey where i was not sure
when i would reach the destination
or where the destination was exactly

but then you
oh you

the moment my soul felt yours
the moment our eyes met across the bar
i knew right then
right there

i was home

finally