pregnant with jealousy  
I give birth  
and cradle it in my arms
I let it cry ... scream ... **** ...  
then I sing a lullaby  
and remind us that we are still
loved
until it shrinks  
and crawls back into my gut

My heart is broken  
It didn't happen all at once  
There was a series of cracks and wounds and bruises  
Held together by a few desperate strands of self-care
Still, I go on
Until I decide I do not have to live like this  
And call out for change
Finally, a doctor hears  
Smiling, he grabs my heart  
Squeezes it tight  
And it shatters  
Still beating

I lose myself  

In the blur of fall colors  

Wind flowing through my hair  

Singing along to my favorite songs  

Surrounded by people I love  



Then I am found  

A TR*MP 2020 sign  

Reminds me where I am  

And what I have to lose

Make your world better  

Be your own manic pixie

That's the dream, right, girl?

This time.

This time.

This time.

Like a fly trying to get outside, I keep slamming into seen and unseen barriers.

I keep trying and hoping.

This time will be different.

This time things will work out.

This time.  

My skull is cracked

Blood is running down my chest

But I keep trying and hoping.

This time.  

This time.  

This time.

It's almost "cuffing season"

So please hold out your wrist

We can keep each other warm  

Before the cold even hits



Wrap your arms around me  

And squeeze me tight  

Let me melt into you  

Make me feel alright  



When the snow disappears  

I fear you will too  

But in the meanwhile  

I'mma call you my boo



It's almost "cuffing season"

So please hold out your wrist

We can keep each other warm  

Before the cold even hits