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The poem be the knife
That is indeed very sharp
.                                      and can easily cut the brain
.                                      where you will fill its meaning!
Notes (optional)
I was waiting for the longest time,
he said, "I thought you forgot..."

"It's hard to forget,"  I said,  *"When there is such an empty space
when you're gone..."
I also lost someone who meant the world to me, you weren't the only one
 Aug 2015 Anto MacRuairidh
Emma
If I were to make a poem
About how you
Make me feel
It would contain
Waves of sadness
And mountains of doubts
heavy rains of anxiety
And tornadoes of thoughts
Forests of innocence
That the fires of passion
Would burn out
Lightning bolts of panic
And whirlwind of emotions
That’s all your about
You left me a mess.
It occurred to me this morning
As I shuffled under the sheets of his skin
That if he was Fat Man,
I was Nagasaki
And if he was Little Boy
I was Hiroshima.

Because in the end
I will be the one with the disintegrated body
And deformed children of memories
And he will fly free,
The mushroom cloud of my soul's ambition
Billowing in the distance.
I broke it off with the love of my life  
Two weeks after I started a second full time job
Which would have given me enough money
To rescue him.
When I had told him,
His eyes fluttered away from mine
Like a parent's would
And being twelve years older than me,
I guess he had room to look at me like that.

What do you do when the one person who you care about
More than Kubrick or living
Decides he does not want to
Put you in a position where
You have to take care of him
Even though you've always been the adult in the situation
And you've grown quite fond of it?
What do you do when not even a week after the parting
You find yourself
Growing attached to another walking disaster
Who's body may quake when you touch him
But who's skin crawls with the ghosts
Of lost admiration
Under your fingertips?
In a world where I was made out to be a goddess
I am now just another cog in the bougeouise high-earning machine.
I let love make me it's victim and now
I am the Greek goddess of regret
And I am fascinated by the way men ruin themselves.
He told me he didn't want me to have to be
The person who is constantly drowning in work
Just to keep our heads above water
But I would have walked to hell and back
Barefoot
If it had meant helping him and staying with him.

Today I woke up in the same bed as my new love
And when my fingers grazed his bronzed
And toned back,
I looked for your scar
And it wasn't there
And I panicked.

Tomorrow I will wake up in bed alone
And I will look for my own scars
And I will find them
Stretching across all the skin you caressed
And the heart you left in shambles
And I will rejoice in being home.
Death around theee cornner
I got me a burner
Huggin' and bustin' on fools
fake thuggin'
Mean muggin'
Since my heart was made of stone
Had no choice but to roll.on my own
My enemies plot try to get me shot
But the bullets always miss
Cuz **** nigguhs dont die we multiply
Rise with the gleam in my eye
Look up in the skies i see blessin'
Pourin'
If get raided at night
My homies we'll be arrested in the morning
Still mournin'
The days of slavery 400 years and still aint free
Heyyyy i still pave the way for better days
Sun rays to radiate my skin from sin
But since i was made of clay
Its hard for me to take in
Gladness all i see is madness
Used to be the youngest but now im the baddest
Put the spark in the heart of a bad *****
Most nigguhs turn snitch then end up in a casket
Lifes drastic myself i try to miss the plastic
But since i invested in **** life streets had to be mastered recipient of a *******
No ******' father
So i played my own rules always skipped curfew
Smoke a little **** or two
Liqour pours for my homies long buried
Bruce I'll always keep ya in my memory
My enemies
I vision dying vain in mad pain
Like an overdose of ******* dead brain
Im antimatter
So if ya touch me be prepared to get shattered
Like broken glass from copper to cash
Rollin' in 64 with 140 on the dash as
Mash on the gas
Evadin' adversaries nothin' is colder
Embracin' hell on earth
I seee death around the cornaaaaaa


And if yaaaa
Feeel me
Let the pistol smoke freely
Believe me
Cops killin' us for free no mercy
No quotes from me
I just see it how i see it
Since i embrace the gangsta lifestyle
I had to be it
My momma couldnt see it
Pastors couldn't believe it
That ******* region aint never moved me
Or my soul im standing bold
Got my eyes 10 years ahead of the game
Since i dodged the fame and the flame
I'd rather embrace the pain
Open knowledge for my brain
I feel closer to the devil than to God
Cuz he got too many demands for life mod
Against all odds?
Facin' the nation
With my ******* to the world
Even the spiritual world gone feel this
Im relentless
Rip through vocal chords on the track
Yea im black so i put a defense to avoid attack
Never slack keep all eyes on me
Yall can shot but yall will never bury me
Im resurrected split up the blunts
Stash the **** now the spirits selected
Me as a leader born for war
In the days of aeon last stages
Streets enraged in the need of a Savior
I keep my pistol concealed
If you got beef
I got bullets yo can feel
N saturate yo body for its last meal
My **** is real straight from grill
Im.on the verge of a ****
Ya know the deal
A warrior and a kin to Nat Turner
Im seeing deeath peakin' around the cornnaaaa


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