Harsh

Harsh Dec 2014

Maps

We were an explicit map

You were Bremerton
I was Washington

and I was all over you

You sent chills down my spine
from Spokane to Ellensburg

They could hear us down in Centralia,
your moans sent the leaves
in North Cascades National Park rustling.

I was inspired to write this from reading another piece similar to this, I believe it used Ohio as one of the locations. I haven't been able to find the original but as soon as I do I'll post up a link.

#love #poetry #life #passion #poems #me #personal #foryoumydear #kda #harshhappens

Harsh Nov 2014

She's

She's
not just a girl.
No, one cannot simply
call her a girl.

She's
a storm,
a storm with skin, bound by
passion and dreams.

She's
a temptation,
her body a fire,
My senses a helpless moth.

She's
a maestro,
her laugh being
the sweetest symphony of all.

She's
a lioness,
the way she perseveres,
fights, and defends.

She's
a diamond,
brilliant and rare,
to be cherished and protected.

She's
a mile,
but only if
beauty was an inch.

Because it's her favorite.

#love #poem #poetry #life #me #favorite #personal #foryoumydear #kda #harshhappens

Harsh Nov 2014

Birdsong x Between Two Lungs

Within my body is a bird's perch
and you've gone and fluttered your way into my heart,
making your nest of love and memories.
Your song's sweet notes float their way into my soul
and make me hum a song of longing.
You've made a home in my heart, dear,
and I've grown so accustomed to you
that you've become a part of me now.
My ribs exist to protect you, not my fragile heart.
My veins carry your melody like oxygen,
my lungs and heart have moved
to integrate you into the synergy of my chest.
The effects of your presence are permanent,
there is no undoing your being.

There is no going back.
My love has gone out to you,
irretrievably, irreplaceably, unconditionally.
And even now, my body is already sore,
anticipating and dreading the day you fly away.
It aches in fear of you wrenching your home from my ribs,
shattering the protection I've maintained for you.
The shards of my bones and the splinters of your nest
will forever remain embedded within
my flesh and my mind for all of eternity.
You may decide one day that you want to return home,
and I will split open these bones of mine once again,
just to welcome you back.

But you might not want to come back, however.
And in that case just know that you live on;
in my mind forever loved and remembered.
This pierced heart will always beat to your rhythm,
your song will always flow through my veins.
My flesh will always remember the touch of yours.
Know that within your own ability to fly, you gave me wings.
As you've grown over time, I've grown as well.
Just know that I will always hum your song
to comfort and heal myself, even as you flutter away
and I clutch at my chest and my sheets
while a note of hope rises in my throat.

"I have this breath and I hold it tight,

to keep it in my chest with all my might,

I pray to god

this breath will last,

even as it pushes

past my lips

as I...

gasp."

This poem was influenced by the songs Birdsong and Between Two Lungs by Florence + The Machine. Great songs, if you haven't heard them before.

#love #heartbreak #poem #poetry #sad #life #me #personal #kda #harshhappens

Harsh Nov 2014

Deteriorate

There's
a hint of desperation
in my bullet eyes
shooting left to right to the back of my head

my heart's a demolition derby
and my ribs are sore
from its exaggerated beating
and there's a faint
splintering in its cage
But if no one's around to hear it,
Are my bones really shattering?

my pulse is on vibrate
this blood that rushes through my veins is *****;
it's metallic, it's acidic.

My lungs are an alchemist's nightmare.

My breath has left me with
the finality of the last nail being hammered down
on this coffin that's formed around my mind.

I collapse, a deteriorated, detrimental mess.
I am broken and mangled, a victim of paranoia and self-consciousness
I brought this upon myself,
and I yield to the hurt that surrounds my soul.

#poem #poetry #life #pain #me #desperation #personal #angry #rage #harshhappens

Nov 2014

Beaux

Dear Girls of the World,

Hey you're more than pretty. You're gorgeous. You're eyes sparkle brighter than any star. Your smile beats the moon. Your hair is so much fun to play with. Remember not to starve, purge, cut, tear, stab, poke, burn, scratch. There's no need too. I don't need to see your face to know your beautiful. I don't care what the mirror says. You deserve to know the ugly truth. You will always be beautiful and there's nothing you can say or do to change that.

For every girl, guy, and everyone in between. You deserve to feel beautiful. 'I kissed the scars on her skin and I still think your beautiful. I don't think I could ever lose my best friend.

#beauty #what #this #like #is #feels #magicath

Harsh Nov 2014

Irretrievable Love

If I finally lost myself,
and the pieces of my mind and soul
were as scattered as my thoughts,
would you find them for me
and help piece me back together?

If these nightmares finally come true,
and my fears and my worries
begin ripping me apart at my seams,
would you fight them off
and stitch together my heart?

If I believed what I saw in the mirror
and what my mind was whispering in my ear, and began my slow descent into the abyss of self loathing,
Would you tell me how you love me?

Your words of comfort and consolation are the remedy to the sickness of my mind, an antidote to these poisonous thoughts. I wish they were a vaccine but my mind requires the occasional reassurance.

I regret these thoughts and the weight they share in both our hearts, I don't wish to impose this noxious state of mind upon you. But even when my mind is burning,

even when I wake, gasping, in the middle of the night, when Pandora's Box is wrenched from my hands and forced open, and Hope flies out,

I swear. I swear that I'll love you. I'll love you with my rough hands, with these tired eyes. I'll love you with every last shred of my being, even in the deepest pit of self-hate.

Because you're the bottom of that pit. You don't let me fall deeper into my hate. You lift me up and you give me hope. You give me a reason to smile again.

When my life flashes before my eyes, it's a boring movie for a while, but then your image comes into the frame and everything becomes brighter and livelier.

I love you in the most irretrievable and unconditional way. I've signed off my soul and heart off to you, I have your name and your smile branded into my brain.

Everything I have and everything I am, everything I will ever be and that I will ever have, is yours. I surrender myself entirely to you, a flawed being with good intentions.

I would lay upon the very ground you walk on and be your bridge when all of them have burned down. I would carry you on my back when your legs give out from underneath you.

I would swim across oceans and fight currents to pull you closer to me, I would take a blade or a bullet or both, to prevent any harm from coming to you.

I know it may seem overwhelming to you my dear but I won't apologize for the way I've fallen for you. I'm in love with you, and there's no use in denying the truth.

So for as long as you choose to deal with my thoughts and my fears, I promise to love you and listen to you and kiss you with all of my heart and every bit of me I can.

#love #poem #poetry #life #pain #me #nightmare #foryoumydear #kda #harshhappens