my tears aren’t forced
they flow in that
dark tunnel that she
dreamed so long ago
she wasn’t ready
to take her first steps
I wasn’t ready to
take mine without her.
Little things bring her back
like empty bowls or the tower
of books she’s never going to read.
People have been calling this a
trauma, but they’ve forgotten the
loneliness of life’s journey. She dreamed
a tunnel and added bright lights
and dusted the floor with powdery snow
she traveled far yet I can
only see the trails of
milk puddling around the lost key that she
dropped under blankets
of memory and phrases of
I-promise and tomorrow. I’m growing up as
she falls down. She wasn’t
perfect but that’s why it
was so easy to love her.
My journey’s ongoing, and the
deep undercurrents of pain and
grief are pulling me through
that tunnel.
I’m rowing softly by,
quietly, quietly,
as she is laid to rest.
her memories swallow the emptiness
she is kneeling at the throne.
I follow slowly and leave my
tears for her to know that life’s
path isn’t paved in water but
with sorrow, with endings, and with lost
boats on turbid seas.

This is nothing but another depressed soul

Typing away all that I know

See I've been months clean

But there is things unseen

A smile that is fake

A laugh they can't take

Beneath it all something I couldn't take

Cry with me
Reassemble my broken heart
Yesterday was yesterday so today cry with me

she was not fragile like a snowflake.
she was fragile like a bomb.
and i didn't know which was scarier-
                                                        ­  her explosion or her calm.

I can't stop thinking of you

and that beautiful face,

with the prettiest eyes I've ever laid my own upon.

I can't stop thinking of you

and your voice that just takes me straight to heaven

while I can hardly do much else but type.

I can't stop thinking of you

and that personality that I can't get enough of,

The humor is endless and the beauty I see goes on forever

It's like meeting your best friend for the first time and having that moment of the best joy you've ever felt,

Except with you I have that feeling everday

I can't stop thinking of you,

I like having you in my thoughts

I can keep you safe there for now, at least until I can hold you in my arms for real

I can't stop thinking of you....


And I don't ever want to stop

Embrace your flaws.
Whatever they may be.
The scars,
the marks,
the signs of all the pain.
The crooked smile,
The hair.
All of them,
because they are beautiful.
You are beautiful.