there was a girl in class
who had a perfect punctuality report
but always seemed absent to me

and so i asked,
“when you’re in class,
seated a few seats away from me,
where are you really?”

and her eyes spoke

she was not here on earth

she was on the moon,
drinking up the sight of
stars and suns

she was on a distant planet,
fighting up robots
and fiends trying to destroy earth

she was on the sun,
roasting marshmallows
with all the other pretty alien girls

she was everywhere,
she said

she was everywhere
but here

because here was where
reality took place

and reality was no place
for the wandering kind

you never tried to analyze me.
you never took a flashlight to the darkest parts of my mind, never checked my aching bones to make sure they were alright.
you never checked my lungs to see that they were filled with water, never saw my shoulders, the burden they were under.
you only saw my face, readied and pristine, my face constantly smiling whenever i heard your name.
you never examined the backs of my eyes to see what keeps coming back, never checked my spine to see if something makes it crack.
you never checked my muscles, you never checked my heart. if you had dusted it for fingerprints, you would've only found his marks



[this heartbreak hollowed out my bones, and weighs a thousand pounds, it pushed me underwater, but your name, i can't quite drown out. you're trapped inside my head, i hope you do get out, you're the burden i am under, i really have no doubt. if you had checked for fingerprints, you wouldn't have been invested, if you had checked my heartstrings, you wouldn't have been tested.
you failed the science test this time and i'm so sincerely sorry. but if you had checked for variables you wouldn't have had to worry]

i had your heart in my hands. and i dropped it in confusion.

number one, do not use depression as an excuse. do not use a flaw in chemistry to contaminate another soul.
second, a home is never a building. it's built a human, and it's constantly on the move - embrace changes. but like buildings, it may get demolished.
third, the hardest goodbyes are never bade. notice the colours fading, you're close.
number four, realise that the past is a broken record ought to be disposed.
fifth, all suppressed truths become toxic. not all harsh truths are better than lies, remember, telling a lie causes the liar to believe it. it might change him.
number six, emptiness is heavy. and feeling heavy weighs you down. $tay high, you'll feel lighter.
seventh, smiles are just expressions of joy. not radiating it leaves traces on your heart.

i had your heart in my hands, and i dropped it, i dropped it each time.

( FAH )

.        Child of the stars
                Chaos, incarnate,
      hold your heart still.
          Your
             Tiny
              Perfect
          Human
   Existence;
        My king of a mountain of Ash.
                                                            ­         You
are the song you couldn't write
      and it's frustrating
                                         because you
are still standing.
        Still Breathing.
                             Wild
                       Hurricane
                  Heart,
I didn't know that stars
                       Could break
         before I met you.