One day morning,
The birds are chirping.
The flowers are blooming.
I say "Hi" to my friends
Laugh with them.
One day morning
I am okay.

That day afternoon
The sky turns to gray
Cold wind blows
Rain starts to fall
I don't want to see my friends
That day afternoon
I'm not okay.

That evening night
No moon shining
No stars twinkling
I am ignoring my friends calls
I just cry for no reason
I feel empty, I feel nothing
That evening night
I know I'm not gonna be okay

But,

That evening night
I'm still wishing to be okay.

i asked her, does it look the same?
she gave me that funny look she gets
whenever i say or do something a little dim
it's a mirror image for a reason she said

in the mirror i see muscles, and strength
hips a little too wide and fleshy
but still muscular,
strength all the way down

but when i reflect on myself,
no mirror necessary
it is never the same

i don't feel as strong as i could
don't look as sharp and sturdy as i could
those fleshy sides, too soft
for a battle-hardened brain
and turbulent thoughts

i need angles, i need straight lines
but there's nothing straight about me
and that's half the problem

and the other half
is that i hate the softness that lingers
but everybody else loves it
and i don't want to be warm and
able to be cuddled

i want hard edges
and nimble, spindly fingers;
when i play my chords
i want my bones to tap the strings

and when sadness sheathes itself within me
i want eyes as dry
as my eczema-bitten hands

debating whether i am allowed
to go out of the house at 8pm
or not
“because i might get *****”

debating whether i am allowed
to wear that skirt that goes little above my knees
or not
“because i might get *****”

debating whether i am allowed
to meet up with a guy
or not
“because i might get *****”

debating whether i am allowed
to stay at my friends house when they have older brothers
or not
“because i might get *****”

debating whether i am allowed
to go on a school trip
or not
“because i might get *****”

Do you see this?
Do you see the reason they give for a woman to not do certain things?
****.

How can we live in this world
peacefully
when we have to fear for our lives
almost every moment

This is who you are.
Beautiful—
No. You are not.
You are Ugly.
To be specific
You are a girl full of insecurities.
You are a girl full of envy in veins—
Yes. You are.
Are you Self worth?
Are you Confident?
You are not.
Are you the girl who always compare herself to others?
Are you the girl who cannot standout?
Are you the girl who cannot make her own light?
Yes you are.
Are you loved?
No.
You are not wanted.

a woman shouldn't be called by sweet names,
'cause she can also be bitter when neglected.
a woman shouldn't be called a princess or a queen,
'cause she can also be a knight when hurt.
a woman shouldn't be called love,
'cause she can also use her intelligence to know of you are cheating.
a woman should be called by her name,
'cause it is the most lovely thing she will hear from the man she loves.