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So little left of what was the real me
The lies and pain chip away my heart
I long for something real and forever
To be loved and wanted not torn apart
True permanence in love seems a myth
But I've always believed in fantasy
Disenchantment is never a thought
Here I remain cocooned in my misery.
Not one of my best but my mood today spoke these words.
I have come to an impasse in my life
I no longer have a definitive direction
Now only questions without answers
And answers with no explanation
In all things I lack the closure I crave
Just a gaping hole filled with misery
I long to at last carve out the sorrow
To be free and **** that part of me
That part that refuses to let me heal
To let the scars of the past fade
But some wounds never truly mend
And in this realization I am unmade.
I'm in a dark place. Don't know if this will make sense to many, but just maybe one or two.
June 1st, 2008:
They'll never convict me, they don't have any real proof, I cleaned up all my mess, no one knows the truth

January 29th, 2009:
**** Lawyer, says he's got so much evidence. Wait until he hears my defense. Rock solid alibi, I wasn't even there that night!

March 10th, 2009:
My lawyers a shmuck but I think he knows his stuff. Talking about blood patterns and mismatched knives. Can't this jury just admit I'm innocent and get on with their lives?

November 14th, 2009:
Well, now there's a new witness, says he saw me that night. I know it can't be true, I kept outta sight. Supposedly he heard her scream, but I know that's not right. I had her mouth duct taped tight

August 15th, 2010:
Guilty! How the hell can this be?!  This wasn't supposed to happen to me!

February 12th, 2011:
That girl was asking for trouble, it was unavoidable, anyone can see I didn't do no wrong, this **** jail cell ain't where I belong!

May 2nd, 2011:
I'm getting the chair!? This just isn't fair. I got a lot of family to think about, they believe I'm innocent, beyond a doubt

July 21st, 2011:
I don't understand why they haven't come to visit me, it's actually starting to get kinda lonely.

December 25th, 2011:
Well, it's Christmas today, here I am in my cell. I can't even remember when I actually fell. Why did I **** that poor young girl?  Robbed her of her chance to make it in this world.

March 30th, 2012:
Please God, forgive me for my sins, help me find salvation. I'll never again bow to wicked temptations. I'm getting electrified in such a short time, can you help me find a way to ease my troubled mind?

April 6th, 2012:
Please God, please, I beg of you, just get me out of here! I'll trust in you, in YOU I'll fear! Please save me from this awful fate, in you, my love will be great!

April 8th, 2012:
Well, God, I guess you haven't been listening, are you even there? I tried to change my ways, do good, but I'm pretty sure you no longer care. I'm sorry but I just don't believe anymore, I'm not even sure why I'm saying this prayer because tomorrow morning I'm getting the chair

April 9th, 2012:
I'm walking the dreaded green mile to take my last breath. I admit, I did wrong, but what will I say to Death?  Sitting here, while they strap me down, through the glass in front of me, looking all around, I see the faces of her parents, crying. Well, I guess they're getting their wish, I'm dying. I repented, I asked for forgiveness, they ask if I have any last words. There was only one thought going through my head... So I said..  "Where does my soul go when I'm dead? Of all my evil doings here on earth, what price am I really worth? Do you all really believe that I truly deserve death?" and as I take my last breath, nobody answered me

Then...

*Electricity
I'm not claiming to understand what really goes through a death row inmates mind, this is simply my interpretation of one made up 'Dead Man'
I hope you all like it.
Please comment any thoughts.
Thanks.
I'm lost in the dark
someone light a candle.
I see no way to the path
only darkness and nothingness.
Stumbling around in circles
Hoping to find some familiar sign
But there is nothing to save me
You see I'm lost in my own mind.
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