So many fear others,
As a threat to their well being.
But me, I fear myself,
And the havoc that I can bring.

I don't fight for others,
My own selfishness controls me.
I don't oppose others,
Yet I battle against myself.

To eat some food.
To put down the knife.
To bear the pain.
To save my life.

People will tell you to,
"Just be happy," like it's a switch.
But it's not that easy,
For me to leave this sadness pit.

Do they honestly think,
I want to feel this agony?
I'd switch it if I could,
But the world doesn't work that way.

It's always there.
The sadness and rain.
I sleep in dread.
I wake in pain.

It's always weighing down,
A constant anchor on my heart.
Fear fills up my stomach,
I will forever be distraught.

Depression is scary,
And I am one of it's victims.
I try to stay alive,
Fighting for what feels like lifetimes.

What if one day.
I finally lose.
And I give up.
My grip grows loose.

But the pain and the fear,
I promise you, they aren't the worst.
It's the thoughts that destroy,
Picking at your soul till it hurts.

"You'll be much happier,"
"They're better off without you here."
"End your misery now,"
It's the true ones that catch your care.

No matter what.
I'll fight till it ends.
If I rise up.
Or if I **fold.