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 Jun 2015 elliphant
Vamika Sinha
Their poetry imperceptibly
slipped
into the first person.

Neither of them noticed
when
'he and she'
became
'you and me'

Let's analyse that, shall we?
 Jun 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
6 am i was there
telling you,
"have a good day at school today my dear."

and at 12 noon,
i would check up on you.

at 10pm
i'd send you off to bed
saying, "sleep tight, and don't worry your little head."

and some nights at three,
when the demons in your head won't flee
i'd tell you stories about me
until you fall asleep.


the amount of days since you left has been sixty-two
and i'm finally beginning to see
that i didn't lose you,
you lost me.
 Jun 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
I don't know what it is,
But something's missing
Something's missing from me
And I think that's you.

I feel like a defective doll
One that won't operate without being tuned
One that won't laugh
Without unless you put in a battery
I'm like a mute that won't sing
Unless given a tune.

And that tune, and that battery,
They're you.
And I miss the day we spent basically the whole day together
I miss your presence
& I can't help but feeling
Defective without you.
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
i could delete your pictures,
i could block you.
i could sit and write a million "i hate you's",
but it doesn't change how i feel about you.

i could delete your number,
i could force my your name down my throat whenever i feel it coming up,
and if it does come up i could puke on it
and flush it like a bad memory.
will this change how i feel?
no.

i could find every song that speaks about the hatred of a love that has gone wrong,
and belt it out at the top of my lungs.
i could burn every poem i ever wrote about you,
and swear to never write another one.
but not even this would change the way i feel about you.

you can check me a thousand years later
and you'll see that my love for you will never run dry.
(h.s)
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
To: The brokenhearted girl

And to the boy who broke your heart,
I honestly hope he's happy,
I hope he's pleased with what he had done.
I hope he's sleeping peacefully, because you aren't.

I hope he shivers in pain, when he thinks of you
I hope his ears get tired of hearing your name
Over, and over and over again
Especially on nights when he's restless.
Especially on nights when he can't sleep
Especially on nights when his eye lids won't shut.
I hope he remembers the taste of your lips
And yearns for it when your lips hits the lips of another man.
I hope his dreams are filled with images of you
Images of you happier than ever,
Images of you finding someone that's better.
I hope when he eats, he remembers how your hand cradled the food
How your lips surrounded it and how your jaws turned almost hypnotically as you savoured the food the same way you did to his tongue.

And I hope when the lips of another are on him, they'll feel like yours
And her touch, will feel like your touch,
And her hair,
Her hair ..
I hope it smells like yours.
And I hope the kisses of another, will feel like lashes compared to yours
And i hope their touch, will feel like burns compared to yours
As if he's receiving a punishment for letting you go
As if he's receiving a punishment for falling in the arms of another.
As if he's receiving a punishment for using the word "love" too much.

And i hope the minute he utters "I love you" , he'll remember the times he told you,
He'll remember each one of them as if it was yesterday,
Remember which ones were lies,
Break down in tears
And comes crawling back to you.

But darling, don't forget to tell him it's too late.

Sincerely,
An onlooker
(h.s)
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
And I'm sorry that I left your heart at the peak of that cliff
The cliff that we had climbed to,
Yeah that cliff we reached
That cliff where you liked me
That cliff where I liked me.

And I'm sorry that I walked away,
You just weren't giving off light anymore
No spark, no flame. Nothing
You were dull, things got dull.

And I'm sorry I told you to that we should go separate ways.
I thought that was best.
You were falling,
And I wasn't about to catch you
Because at the bottom of that cliff, I was frolicking with another.
Too bad he turned me down days later, for another.

AND I AM SORRY THAT I CANNOT LIKE YOU IN THE WAY THAT YOU LIKE ME ANYMORE
AND I'M SORRY THAT YOUR HEART ACHED THE DAY I LEFT
And your mind .. ?
I'm sorry that it's stuck on me.
I'm sorry that you still think about me,
I'm sorry I'm still in your dreams
And I'm sorry that your shirt still smells like me from the last time we hugged.

And I'm sorry that until now, I've never been able to write a proper poem about you,
I'm sorry that I cannot finish this one, because I'm in tears and my fingers are getting weak and I just can't .. I'm sorry
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
And I'm sorry that I left your heart at the peak of that cliff
The cliff that we had climbed to,
Yeah that cliff we reached
That cliff where you liked me
That cliff where I liked me.

And I'm sorry that I walked away,
You just weren't giving off light anymore
No spark, no flame. Nothing
You were dull, things got dull.

And I'm sorry I told you to that we should go separate ways.
I thought that was best.
You were falling,
And I wasn't about to catch you
Because at the bottom of that cliff, I was frolicking with another.
Too bad he turned me down days later, for another.

AND I AM SORRY THAT I CANNOT LIKE YOU IN THE WAY THAT YOU LIKE ME ANYMORE
AND I'M SORRY THAT YOUR HEART ACHED THE DAY I LEFT
And your mind .. ?
I'm sorry that it's stuck on me.
I'm sorry that you still think about me,
I'm sorry I'm still in your dreams
And I'm sorry that your shirt still smells like me from the last time we hugged.

And I'm sorry that until now, I've never been able to write a proper poem about you,
I'm sorry that I cannot finish this one, because I'm in tears and my fingers are getting weak and I just can't .. I'm sorry
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
11:11 (2)

Wish I could take back that "*******"
Wish I could take it crush it,
Use my tears as kerosene & burn it.
That "*******" ruined everything,
That "*******" changed me since.

& if I could apologise a million times I  would.
I would've written at your doorsteps,
I would've written on your sheets
I would've written it in your notebooks
& in every single place we'd meet.
I would've written it in your palms
I would've written it over your walls
I would've written it upon the ground on which you trod.

And when we meet instead of saying "hi" I'd say "I'm sorry".

Wish I could rewind to the day you said "Marry me?"
I swear that was the funniest, but best day of my life
& you made me laugh like no other
Smile like no other
And it's still the same five months later.

Wish I could rewind to the day we first kissed,
And if I knew it was the last,
I would've made the best of it.
I would've held on so tight
That you eventually start begging me to let go.

Wish you didn't want *** so much
Wish we could've thrived on just love.
Wish nudes weren't your requirements
Wish you never gave up.

Wish my heart would stop calling your name !
If only you knew, it's in constant quarrels with my brain
My heart wants you,
But my mind's saying "just let him fade away"

Wish you could make you me smile one more time.
And I wish you'd give us one more try.

I know it's only wishful thinking, because you'd never want back a mess like me.
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
11:11
 May 2015 elliphant
antxthesis
Am I really over you,
When I constantly wish to taste your lips once more
To cling onto you for a bit more,
To laugh at your jokes once more
And to gaze in your eyes for 3 more seconds, because that's the longest i could manage ?

Am I really over you,
When every poem since then has a bit of you,
When everything someone says & every little thing I come across reminds me of you ?

I think at 11:11 tonight, I'll wish for you.
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