To exist in the light,
we must be mindful of the dark
and every shade in between.

A close friend of mine who has depression tells me she knows that it can be difficult not knowing.  She says it was why she was afraid, because the happiness she felt was arbitrary and that sooner or later it would be replaced with soul-******* and mind-numbing hopelessness. Too happy, meant that it was a step and crash away from being too sad. Every good feeling had a sour ending.

But I’ve realised that such is the rhythms of life, and the balance that keeps us in check. This is the human condition where compassionate and noble people also experience shame, wounds and discarded pieces no one wants to see. People can hold breathtaking beauty while inexorable darkness runs through their veins.  

Light and dark both hold the innate understanding
that one cannot exist without the other.
It is for the same reasons that we must let ourselves have access
to the full range of our humanness.

Here in the desert
it's been raining
on and off
            for days
making the succulents and cacti
glisten with wetness
their thick skin sparkles
and catches nature's ironic eye
flowers and plants shine
so much better in the half-grey
Here in the prehistoric depths
Of rocky whitewash and silt
             flash floods rush through
flushing out all guilt
         And inside
a raging storm commences
and I feel so blessed
to be a part of this celebration
my lungs expanding in my chest
I breathe in deep
that fresh purity of air
let it cleanse right through me
from my toes up to my hair
It rushes in my body
taking no prisoners in its force
flows through every vein
cleansing poisons in its course
its power flows into me
washing out this stubborn pain
Turning the confusion
                     into clarity again
From inside subconscious thoughts
           realization thunders
rinsing from my mind
                 the emotional strain
and replacing it with euphoric wonders
Come, my raging desert tempest
Bathe me
       penetrate me with wet
restore and purify
my being
take over and disinfect
let me feel my own strength
until it pours out from my cells
into the space inside my heart
where love and lust still dwell
My tears mingle with the sweet drops
                as I fling arms open to the sky
releasing strikes of lightening
for every word I cry
as I summon, pray for lightness
mixed with the sturdiness of earth
Let joy rise up and bubble
within my being
as rebirth

"Thirty plus years in a
loving happy marriage,
My husband taken
by long illness
and sad ending.

Five years companionless
loneliness endured,
Now a naked man
is in my shower,
I can hear him softly
singing."

Love and companionship
can come at any age.
Rendering you both
whole and renewed again.

There are more forces in heaven and earth
than we ever dreamt of in our philosophy;
do we see a bird’s wing beating with sham mirth,
or the stars twinkling out of blind jealousy?
To that I say, comprehend not without your heart
however you choose to with your mind. No one
has the capacity for head knowledge at the start,
except our ability to love, and that is enough.
What each lives through is what each decides to feel.
As we search beyond our eyes, our limited senses, the fleeting unreal,
still greater wisdom will we gladly attain.
The things we call seen, are merely temporal--
so look to things not seen, which are forever eternal.

She’s not a girl you’d pass by on the street
and spare a second fleeting thought,
Nor living within the glossy magazines you read
whose looks you’ve always greatly sought,
She’s a string in a resounding symphony
a note lost in sweet sound of melody
She’s a dab of paint on the canvas
but she doesn’t apologise—she forms the picture,
She’s a tiny flower plucked from the earth
       but she blooms for all she’s worth.