Opulent,
Decadent,
Almost vicelike.
The people grovel,
Teeming among the city that sinks
Under the weight of its own
Infestation of the self.
The glass reflects the leering eyes of the masses.

The stench of the water rises,
Cloying.
Languid in obscenity
The shadows rot, unseen.
A graveyard of moorings past.

A woman falls.
We crowd around,
Vultures
Jockeying for view.

Guitar strings vibrate in the square
The sun beats down.

It was beautiful here,
Once.

Thief.
Lying side by side,
Artfully not touching,
Breathing far quieter than natural inhale exhale. Precision.
You stole my delirious delicious nighttime fantasies.
They were all of you.

Too-salty margaritas
(I knew we shouldn’t have gotten extra coarse salt).
The red gummy melting into my blood,
Our blood. Walking over the fountain
That you don’t remember walking in
Because you were blacked out.

Watching you watch me,
Chin cradled in your hand,
Grinning a little. Pretending like I don’t like it (I can’t help it), but biting my lip and smiling a little in that way I know you like.
Kissing you and melting into your chest and arms and legs.

God has invented gloriously cruel prisons for us.

I define my world in terms of you.
That was your room 4 years ago.
This is the hallway where we shook hands and kissed.
This is the fountain we talked next to,
not the fountain I ****** him on.
I kicked him out,
a real person,
so I could think about you in peace.

A half-dream that something was wrong with my brain and
there was bass growing deafeningly, deafeningly louder.
Too loud, too loud.
Searing, hitting pain.
And I ran to find him because I didn’t know what was happening or how to stop it. And he couldn’t get organized
or to the hospital
and he had to maps it
and I couldn't stop screaming
and he was so scared, crying, wanting to help
but terrified and unable to.