Time flies at the
event horizon.
Started small
when I arrived
barely
baby fish size
grew
and
knew
everything
I did
not
know
tho
I now
stand
elongated in the event horizon
the black hole has me in its
grasp
half-awake
half-asleep
my eyes are open
but in a trance
as images pour into
the darkness below
as pieces and particles
of the galaxy we know
and do not know
fly by.

I recall your whisper
in my ear
mother dear
the night before you died
telling me of the art to
be created in the summer
sky
I am in surrender to these
forces
as every moment of my
self flies bye.
Some nightmares
some daymares
some hearts on fire
salted tears of desire
the black hole shines
in darkness,
nothing can escape
no amount of money
will buy your way out
everything you owe will
be left behind
we can only sail
through that black hole
alone
birth or death
no one knows
some peace is made
and then
we go.

I sat there, as all surrounded me,
All had their part
Each spoke in a tone,
Belittling,
Smearing,
Criticizing,
All surrounded me
Like a circle of hate,
Each word that they
Leaked,
Scratched,
Scarred,
My thoughts inside my mind,
Each was different,
Each word I rejected,
But they wanted more
Mind,
Thought,
Individuality,
My ears bled, as they penetrate
Further in,
Consuming me
It was me or them,
A fractured landscape
Each emotion was a war zone,
On every front
Victories,
Loses,
Laughter,
As they were walking closer
I will never surrender my mind to
Hate,
Fear,
Madness,
And then there was silence
"Had I won"
Were those that surrounded me
Cleansed,
I walked, the mirror close at hand
I saw my face,
"Relief"
It was me, but a reflection
I saw me in the chair
no,
No,
NO,
We stood around our body screaming
"Let me in"
Surrounded by others wanting the
Key @===<
So their voices
Would be heard within.

I will figure my
"Answers"
Out
But first the
"Questions"
Must be asked,
Which came first
Did you
Question
the
Answer
Or was latter, asked first
Like the
Chicken,
And
The
Egg,
Which came first??
The question
The answer
Life is inpart both,
So will it matter which was
"Asked first"
Just a start and beginning,
A finish and an **end.

What happened, what became,
As I walked through
Footsteps of ash
On a polyester floor,
The door opens
Footprints,
Disappear,
Invisible,
As had never been there,
I'm perplexed as my fingers
Feel like spider silk entangled
But nothing is visible,
I ascend the stairs
My hands guild me,
Rooms bear
Naked
Stripped
Exposed
Floor boards, walls different
"What happened"
I was only but gone a day,
Temper flares,
I awaken in the dinning room
Dust unsettled,
As if from a height I fell,
I manage to steady myself
Disorientated,
Confused,
Questioning
What is happening,
I gaze at the stairs
Palm prints  saturate
The walls,
Ash fading imprints
Evaporate,
Erode,
Dissipate
And gone as before,
I look upon a mirror
I see the house as before,
Warmth radiates
I turn but boards greet my gaze
"I scream"
And the mirror cracks
But only silence was heard,
Then I realise I am but a
Memory in the
Halls,
Rooms,
Floor,
I see my self fade
A last memory of a house
That like everything
Had its place,
And like the footprints,
Hands upon a wall,
I fade away,
The last memory of house
That crumbles around me.
"They say memories last forever"
But never again will there be any in these halls.

Time, love, happiness all are relevant to this unresolved conclusion
Positive energy is pursue like the chasing after a ghost through an endless maze
These hedges hide the guides we follow, this way, this way
A voice echoes from the other side

My dreams are filled with broken images, flashes of lost loves
Deaths I died, places I played as a child
Parts and pieces of my soul’s journey spread thin across this universe
And dissolve into the fabric of my existence...

Good karma and bad karma off-balancing aspects
Of our rebirths and growth
Yet blinded we climb this ladder of evolution
Here the goal shall be achieved
The ancient road-map is only a symbol, the road itself is reality
And so our gods smiles and says hold your course...

I am oozing with seething resentment and vitriol tonight
This raging beast comes
courtesy of alcohol and years of unrequited affection

I **** and seethe as I sit here typing this out
one stylus stroke at a time

All I wanted tonight was some affection

I deserve it
I truly do

instead the universe gives me nothing

I sit here
thoughts of hurting myself and others flood my mind

I am the opposite of strong
resentment overtakes what used to be merryment and cheer

I am human and god tonight